C Tann-Starr's Outside Blog


Dang... I missed the FB memo on "See Friendship"

Dang... I missed the FB memo on "See Friendship"

My sister-in-law Mona posted a Playstation blurb on my wall, so I start smiling and went to click the "Like" button and I see a "See Friendship" link sitting right next to it.


I'm thinking, "this is gonna be interesting..." I clicked the link and it was (LOL).

If you are argumentative or really playful with your peeps you are about to be reminded of every damned recent conversation/comment and wall post you have had together because "See Friendship" puts it in order for you. It also has a search box to the right and lists your friends in common on the left, plus your common likes.

How stalker friendly of you FB.

Why do I say that?

Because the idiots who designed this allow you to select two different friends (which means it started out as you thinking you could only check you and another person only to realize you can compare everyone on your friends lists against each other to "discover" stuff).

Theoretically, a parent can put their child's name and the person their child is having a relationship with (if all are friends) and monitor their contact. If you are not all friends you can get a third party friend to do it - NOT COOL FB.

Do you have no imagination of the potential havoc immature people can cause with this new feature?  

Question: Does it still work if you un-friend people? After all, this is about digging up stuff in chronological order recently posted to your wall or the walls of your friends. I am trying to see what my oldest comment/conversation will be while wondering how many college kids are going to un-friend their relatives and people who know their ex-whatever (LOL). 

Question: Are you people trying to destroy your brand? I really like you so START THINKING ABOUT WHAT NEW PRIVACY COMPLAINTS YOU MAY BE CREATING before you launch links that remind people what their last stupid social media argument was about or have them discover that the dumb joke X shared about the boss as a forgotten crass comment on Y's page is now a captured PDF/JPEG screen saver created by a moronic third party in common...

Yes... It is true. We all have at lest one stupid friend and one pain in the a$$ relative...  

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Comment balloon 98 commentsC Tann-Starr • November 06 2010 10:47PM


Oh I see so many problems and possibilities with this hmm

Posted by Larry Story, Total Care Realty, LLC, Greensboro, NC Real Estate (Total Care Realty) almost 10 years ago

Larry, I have already scoped out two cheaters and someone who was supposed to be home sick in a cell shot at a sporting event (LOL). This is a disaster just waiting for the right virtual match up to destroy a marriage or job promotion...

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

I am assuming that they are only sharing "wall" info and not messaging. ??? This is dangerous as it is, but could be so much worse!

Posted by Lindsey Hasford, Bringing you home... (Edina Realty) almost 10 years ago

Hi Carolyn... the only thing that is absolutely safe anymore is not to turn on your PC.  Of course, that will create its own set of life challenges... and a certain degree of ridicule!  :-)

Posted by Steve Shatsky almost 10 years ago

Oh my gosh, one more thing to worry about with facebook. Geez. Yes, I can see the potential problems with that feature.

Posted by Carla Harbert, RE/MAX Omega: Lorain-Medina County Area (www.LorainCountyHomeSales.com) almost 10 years ago

Ah, Facebook ~ a blessing & a curse!

I had an agent say they couldn't make a really important meeting because they were already scheduled with a client for the day.  Same agent then went on to post foursquare check-ins all over facebook to all the restaurants, hiking, shopping he was doing with his girlfriend.

Posted by Hillary Kinnison (Keller Williams Coastal Realty) almost 10 years ago

Lindsey, messaging is private. I shudder at the thought of them ever tweaking our direct messages.

Steve, I blip or jango music over there with a post or two here and there. I stopped playing most of the games and really miss the mindless bliss of having my peeps constantly at hand. Now I pop in an out to direct message people and briefly answer comments left for me. I spend more time deleting requests than playing Mafia Wars. I hate getting out of groups I did not ask to be in an should not have to opt out of something each time I log in. I like my band and merch apps, love my friends, so I am staying. :-)

Carla, that feature is going to get the drama started...

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

Hillary, some people are just clueless to the fact trivial stuff gets time stamped when posted to walls (LOL).

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

Who knew? I've heard of lenders and the IRS using it to check that people's tales of woe are true...

Posted by MichelleCherie Carr Crowe Just Call...408-252-8900, Family Helping Families Buy & Sell Homes 40+ Years (Get Results Team...Just Call (408) 252-8900! . DRE #00901962 . Licensed to Sell since 1985 . Altas Realty) almost 10 years ago

"Question: Are you people trying to destroy your brand? I really like you so START THINKING ABOUT WHAT NEW PRIVACY COMPLAINTS YOU MAY BE CREATING before you launch links that remind people what their last stupid social media argument was about or have them discover that the dumb joke X shared about the boss as a forgotten crass comment on Y's page is now a captured PDF/JPEG screen saver created by a moronic third party in common..."

I have figure out (clip + paste aka copy + paste) I needed to have a referencepoint to allow my clueless self some point of reference in order to complete my redundancy....

..... I may need some sleep too... Actually I think I go to FB and Log-In... I really nave NO IDEA what a WALL IS... FB-WALL ~ I know of other Walls... Brick Wall, Wailing Wall, Stone Wall, Wall of Words, Wall Wall Wall ................

Yes... It is true. We all have at lest one stupid friend and one pain in the a$$ relative...  

Sorry, C Tann-Starr ~ Like the highlighted part of YOUR statement...

I went and re-blipped your A-R post before Even reading it... YUP... Like A Real Moron.... I never said .................. "I, Mott - am the sharpest tool in the shed" .............

Its OK for Me to call myself an idiot.... others need my express consent and permission.

Posted by Mott Marvin Kornicki, Miami Notary & Apostille 786-229-7999 (Waterway Realtors® • Notary Public & Apostille) almost 10 years ago

Scary thought process they have there at FaceBook. Seems like we should at least hear about these things BEFORE they spring them on us. Yikes.

Posted by Randy Ostrander, Real Estate Broker, Serving Big Rapids and West Central MI (Lake and Lodge Realty LLC ) almost 10 years ago

I didn't even notice this. FB keeps making changes. What else is new? lol.

Posted by Jackie Connelly-Fornuff, "Moving at The Speed of YOU!" (Douglas Elliman Real Estate in Babylon NY) almost 10 years ago

I am over here messing around in my social media accounts discovering fascinating things about the people I know who also know my acquaintances. That feature has actually got me commenting less on the FB walls. I'm sending more direct messages now. Hmm... 

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

Michelle, almost a third of the people I am friends with are active law enforcement (ROTFL).

LOL @ Mott. That feature is made for TV drama (LOL).

Randy, I was all over my e-mail trying to figure out how I missed this missive from October 28th... Wall to Wall has been replaced with See Friendship... Now that it has been implemented we are gonna have to figure out if we like having mutual friends stalk each other while checking in on us (LMAO).

Jackie, they are working hard over there... driving us crazy, yeah - but working really hard (LOL). ;-)

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

I hadn't noticed this at all!  I just "unfriended" the creepy agent that emailed my client, and now I can't check him out.  While I think this is a bad idea, it has given me the ability to check what contact other agents are having with my clients.  I wish I had read this before "unfriending" the creep.  Now...off to investigage who else is playing in my sandbox....LOL

Posted by Lina Robertson, REALTOR® Serving Springfield, Nixa and Ozark, MO (RE/MAX Solutions and RE/MAX House of Brokers) almost 10 years ago

Lina, FB is an amazing social media toy. My electronic sandbox is off the hook (LOL). ;-) 

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

FB is a very scary place on the personal level...unless you are completely sure who your "friend" is.

Posted by Karen Fiddler, Broker/Owner, Orange County & Lake Arrowhead, CA (949)510-2395 (Karen Parsons-Fiddler, Broker 949-510-2395) almost 10 years ago

Karen, some of my "friends" are more scary than my "acquaintances" (in my case add a couple of relatives too - LOL). ;-)

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

Facebook never seemed to have a good interface or ideas. They need to have more people who use it contribute to the upgrades. I don't think their success was because of them as much as people liked the idea of connecting with friends and family. So when they try and make stuff it fails.

Posted by Ross Quintana, Real E Smarter Real Estate Coach - 509-362-1966 (Real E Smarter) almost 10 years ago

Ross, I would probably trade "fail" for "periodically disappoints." I do have a lot of fun there (when they are not pissing me off - LOL). :-) 

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago


I had no idea about all of this data tracking. I'm a little frightened by it!

Posted by Richard Weisser, Richard Weisser Retired Real Estate Professional (Richard Weisser Realty) almost 10 years ago

Richard, it can be disconcerting. Especially if you're a wee bit flippant and facetious like I can be. Sometimes you don't remember what triggered a remark when people delete their side and you are staring at your side of a partial conversation... 

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

It is a blessing and a curse sometimes.  I cannot keep up with all the new "features" not necessarily "benefits" on FB.  Thanks for the heads up!

Posted by Karen Feltman, Relocation Specialist in Cedar Rapids, Iowa (Cedar Rapids/Iowa City, IA KW Legacy Group) almost 10 years ago

Management everywhere just started salivating at the thought of "catching" their minions doing/saying things that they're not supposed to be doing.

Posted by Eric Michael, Metro Detroit Real Estate Professional 734.564.1519 (Remerica Integrity, Realtors®, Northville, MI) almost 10 years ago

C- I did not even have the time to notice this change, thanks for pointing it out.

Posted by Jennifer Fivelsdal, Mid Hudson Valley real estate connection ( JFIVE Home Realty LLC | 845-758-6842|162 Deer Run Rd Red Hook NY 12571) almost 10 years ago

One would think that since Facebook has been getting so much slack for it's privacy changes, the people over there that think these things up would think them OUT first. Darn, now I need to go check my privacy settings all over again. Hopefully my privacy settings will cover this. Thanks for bringing it to our attention!

Posted by Cindy Westfall, ABR,GRI Your Tualatin & Portland Metro Real Estate (Premiere Property Group,LLC Portland Metro & Suburbs Oregon) almost 10 years ago

Now I'm concerned that I have missed other potential uncool "buttons". Keep us posted. HUH , on here , not on FB

Posted by Paula Prince, Top 10% Grossing REALTOR in NWA (Better Homes and Gardens Real Estate Journey) almost 10 years ago

This is way too much .... I think FB needs to notify folks about these things ahead of time and allow folks to opt out.   Better yet, they simply should not be collecting this type of information!  I think the public has spoken!

Posted by Joan Whitebook, Consumer Focused Real Estate Services (BHG The Masiello Group) almost 10 years ago
I love FB because I can keep in touch with people that I don't always have time to call but it's definitely a little scary. Sometimes there's just way too much information being given out.
Posted by Lisa Ackerson, CRS - Dallas Fort Worth Area Expert (JP and Associates REALTORS®) almost 10 years ago

It just goes to show you...never say anything online that you wouldn't want read in the newspaper! Or the National Enquirer. LOL

Posted by Lynda White, Admin. Mgr., Keller Williams Realty (Bluegrass Homes & Farms Realty, Agent Know How) almost 10 years ago

Just set all your visibility/privacy settings to friends only or only me. Case closed.

Posted by Mark Daniel (Top Key Realty) almost 10 years ago
I am not seeing that on my facebook profile...does it only show up if you have settings other than friends only?
Posted by Jeani Codrey, If you're not learning, you're not living! (The Learning Jeani) almost 10 years ago

C, what a pain in the ass. You would think as Facebook grows and grows they would behave more responsibly. Who runs it anyway? Some 19 year old kid?


Posted by Andrea Swiedler, Realtor, Southern Litchfield County CT (Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices New England Properties) almost 10 years ago

Chronological investigation sounds like snooping Carolyn. I am still amazed people have time to delve into all this but the FB weenies that designed this are ALWAYS changing it.

Posted by Gary Woltal, Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth (Keller Williams Realty) almost 10 years ago

It is a job to keep up on all the new quirks on all the social media sites -- things change all the time -- thanks for the point out on this one.

Posted by Bob & Carolin Benjamin, East Phoenix Arizona Homes (Benjamin Realty LLC) almost 10 years ago

OK, I'm not great with this stuff on FB because they keep changing it just as I learn it.

But....I can't find this link you are talking about.  Where exactly is it?

Posted by Melissa Brown, Realtor - South Charlotte NC Homes for Sale (Helen Adams Realty) almost 10 years ago

I have always been a little reluctant to post much on Facebook (or any social site) because it can never be erased completely.  Think before posting.....what if (insert name) were to read this 5 years from now!!

I wasn't aware of the link you refered to......just something else to scare me away from Facebook!

Posted by Woody Edwards, A Realtor® Who Answers His Phone! (First Choice Realty, Inc) almost 10 years ago

Hmmm - this is a bit scary.  I haven't put much on FB - because everyone has a friend of a friend of a friend, it seems anyone can get into your wall....

Posted by April Hayden-Munson, Brookfield Wisconsin Real Estate almost 10 years ago

Yikes...  I am going to check it out right now....

Posted by Linda Graves Arnold, St. Louis Real Estate Pro - 314-422-2762 - Referr (Coldwell Banker Gundaker-St. Louis, MO) almost 10 years ago

I had no idea this was part of FB and the more I see of what these folks are doing, the mor eI wonder who's minding the store?  Thanks for your post!

Posted by Peggy Noel, Bouchard, ABR, CDPE, SFR (RE/MAX Commonwealth) almost 10 years ago

Thank you for telling me what that link meant.  For some reason, I just saw it & ignored it.  I'm still a little scared of the button.  Love this blog.  great & funny information :)


Posted by Christina ONeal, Realtor - Ripon California (At Home Real Estate Group) almost 10 years ago

Oh the web of information is only going to get more entangled as time goes on!  You should check out http://socialmention.com to see how your name (or someone else's) is mentioned across social media platforms.  That is an eye opener!

Posted by Richard D. Ferris, Florida State Certified (FHA) Appraiser (AmcAppraisalsinc.com) almost 10 years ago

Now I have to log on to fb and make sure my setting are OK.  Since I use my iPhone primarily, the app is limited and I cant check and change settings so I tend to forget to go to the website and look things over once in a while.

I just blogged yesterday about friending on facebook      http://activerain.com/blogsview/1956595/friend-request-waiting      

Thanks for bringing this to our attention

Posted by Kevin Grimes, Assisting you with ALL of your real estate needs. (Neighborly Realty) almost 10 years ago

Maybe it's a good thing I'm not doing anything much on FB.  It is just too much...

Posted by Karen Steed, Associate Broker Haralson Realty (Tallapoosa, Bremen, Waco, Buchanan, Temple, Carrollton) almost 10 years ago

FB has already created problems for two of my friends who are long married were befriended by old beaus from the past who don't even live in the same part of the country.  What seems like harmless fun to one spouse can seem like betrayal to the other.   No physical contact, no phone conversations, just a little cybercontact and yet it's like a hand grenade thrown into some marriages.  I think FB has the potential to cause more problems than any other social media.  You can't live without it, but you have to think before you post on it and think about who you befriend in terms of how others perceive your posts and your choice of friends. 

Posted by Gail Robinson, CRS, GRI, e-PRO Fairfield County, CT (William Raveis Real Estate) almost 10 years ago

I think one of my kids has the right idea - she only friends a very small number of people who she knows well and that doesn't include me or any other adults.  Or maybe my husband has an even better idea - he doesn't go on Facebook at all.

Posted by Menlo Park Real Estate and Homes for Sale, WendeByTheBay.com - 650.504.0219 - SF Peninsula (Wende Schoof) almost 10 years ago

I like Jimmy Kimmel's idea that before you add someone as a friend you should ask yourself one question...would I loan them $50.00?  I am cleaning house on and unfriending many peeps and resetting my page to friends only, today!

Posted by CJ Johnson, Sales Consultant - Build On Your Lot @ DWH (David Weekley Homes ) almost 10 years ago

Big brother sees everything and we all live in glass houses, so what? Being sooooo guarded as to not be yourself or worse paranoid is better? I hate to tell everyone, nobody reeeeally cares or is watching your every move but it is true. And it is because the world does not revolve around us and your facebook page. The only thing this OCD feeds is head shrinks and chicken little prey...

Posted by David Evans, HUD NLB Cumming GA (RE/MAX TOWN AND COUNTRY) almost 10 years ago

Could you see stuff of others if they in fact had not clicked on the "see friendship" button?

Posted by Tammy Lankford,, Broker GA Lake Sinclair/Eatonton/Milledgeville (Lane Realty Eatonton, GA Lake Sinclair, Milledgeville, 706-485-9668) almost 10 years ago

Ugh, just another thing to worry about on Facebook...  I had no idea that was going on. thanks!

Posted by Curt Baumgarth, CDPE Realtor Serving the Valley of the Sun. 480 26 (Century 21 All Stars) almost 10 years ago

Facebook is so big and has so much of our information that it is definitely scary. 

They are definitely crating things that the average (or normal) person would not want or need.

They are going to be a great stalker tool though.... lovely.

Posted by Joe Yates (eXp Realty) almost 10 years ago

I am getting to the point I don't want to post some things (and be my transparent self lol) because I unfriended long lost 'family members'....for a reason. So they don't see what's going on. They can click on another family member who is friends with them and click on their friend list and see all my comments anyway.

Posted by Celeste "SALLY" Cheeseman, (RA) AHWD CRS ePRO OAHU HAWAII REAL ESTATE (Liberty Homes) almost 10 years ago


Success is simple. Do what's right, the right way, at the right time.

Do this and your facebook will not be a problem.

Posted by Augustus Moy, Opportunistic Real Estate Investment Company (Mesdron Investments) almost 10 years ago

I've always said, "don't say anything you don't want repeated" and now that goes double for facebook!

Posted by Carri Pecorella (Welcome Home Realty) almost 10 years ago

Carolyn, Great information. One needs to be careful of what they are posting on face book. It will still there years down the road.

Posted by Farooq Khan, Real Estate Broker/Owner - CDPE (5 Star Realty Partners) almost 10 years ago

Very complicated!  I guess the younger generation figures this out better.

Posted by Denny and Denise Rockwell, Real Estate Professionals, Staging & Design (Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices California Properties) almost 10 years ago

Dear Carolyn,

It is a brave new world, where three friends can keep a secret, if two of them are dead and the other does not post on Facebook. Everything else is out there to be discovered, even years later, when our poor brains have long forgotten all about it. Interesting times for sure.

Posted by Dörte Engel, ABC - Annapolis, Bowie, Crofton & rest of Maryland (RE/MAX Leading Edge) almost 10 years ago

This is really scary from the standpoint of stalking - for children. You can teach your own kids not to say where they live or go to school, but you can't teach all their friends at the same time.

Funny to see this today, because I just read a "Stupidest criminal of the week" report about a guy who had been a fugitive since 1998. The cops had been watching him on Facebook and when he mentioned how cold it was, one of them (posing as a friend) said "Oh, where do you live that it's so cold." He answered that question and now he's back in jail.

As for saying stupid things. No one should ever write anything - in a letter, in an email, and especially on something like Facebook - that it isn't OK for the entire world to see.

And when you think about it, it's also a good idea not to say things you don't want repeated.

Posted by Marte Cliff, Your real estate writer (Marte Cliff Copywriting) almost 10 years ago

C - I'm not surprised by this one bit.  Facebook keeps changing the rules.  I stopped using fb because of an experience I have had.  To @David #49 only people who don't know us don't care, but people in our world, with good or bad intentions, do and that can be the beginning for trouble.

Posted by Pamela Seley, Residential Real Estate Agent serving SW RivCo CA (West Coast Realty Division) almost 10 years ago

You lost me with the article.  I hate facebook.  For me it is a giant address book full of long lost friends and relatives.  I guess the internet is keeping people honest.

Posted by Gene Riemenschneider, Turning Houses into Homes (Home Point Real Estate) almost 10 years ago

Facebook is like good and evil rolled into one... and I agree with you they need to quit inventing these things and not giving you choices.. if you want to have a frienddhip button it should be a choice not a mandate.. great post! thank you

Posted by Debra Leisek ( Bay Realty,Inc Homer Alaska) almost 10 years ago

Yes check your control settings. You must remember it is a public forum. You can be held legally liable for what you post. I have very limited friends on FB. I believe if you use it for business, use it only for business and be careful. The same with Activerain. We want to share, but it to can leave you fonder-able to lawsuits. Anything that is public must be dealt with cautiously. This is the world we created and voted for intentionally or with our silence.

There is away to block your pics from being scene on the walls of other people. Under privacy I have friends only all the way down. If that is not enough, I too will be raising some noise too!


Bee's Graphic Design of Corona CA

Posted by Sylvia Bulanek, Graphic Design and Marketing (Bee's Graphic Design | Corona | Inland Empire) almost 10 years ago

You have to be very diligent to proct your privacy today.  Be aware that the terms of service of most websites are constantly changing. According to most terms of service it is your responsibility to check their website for any changes so they never have to notify you.

Posted by Dennis Neal, Your Home Sold in 45 Days or We Se (RE/MAX, Big Bear) almost 10 years ago

I like your style C.  Thanks for calling them out.  While it is a great tool you need to be careful.

In the end, Facebook's main goal is not to help you get clients or make friends and keep in touch with them.  Their goal is to get every person on the planet to log onto their website and use it often.  They are doing a good job of it obviously, but we all need to be careful the way you are.


Posted by Josh & Julie Hambarian (Josh & Julie - Steele Realty. North County San Diego Coastal) almost 10 years ago

FB is a gift and a curse, like a lot of technology.  I guess us humans need to use more discretion on how we use it and not let it control us.



Posted by Leanna Scott (Leanna Scott Homes) almost 10 years ago

Personally, I think the whole FB thing is a major invasion of privacy, but by the same token it sure is nice to reconnect with shirt tail family and long lost friends!  If I were the kind of person to worry about a world takeover (such as in the movie Red Dawn), I'd have to say the best way to track down every person that might resist would be to confiscate the database of a site like Facebook...

Yet, I'm still amazed at how some people think they can set their privacy settings to "private."  There really is NO such thing on the internet.  Sometimes your worst enemies come in the ole sheep's clothing thing, and it is WAY easy to take a screen shot of something that's been published on FB...

By the same token, one shouldn't blame FB for any consequences of what's been published, as in talking about bad behavior, venting about your crazy boss, whatever.  It's a little like the old saying, "in vino veritas" meaning you probably will say what's really on your mind when you've had a little bit too much wine.  Or... if it quacks like a duck, it probably is a duck...  How you "behave" on FB is quite likely just exactly who you really are, and FB is just the messenger.  So if one carries on an illicit affair on FB, then they are not only a dishonest person, they're pretty stupid on top of it.  It's not FB's fault.

Having rambled on like I tend to do, the bottom line in my opinion is that social sites like FB SHOULD tend to cause people to take a good look at just who the heck they are, and possibly give them a pretty good reason to upgrade themselves a bit.  I'm sure I'm being unrealistic.  But it is a hope.  :-)

Posted by Victoria CB Trees, Principal Broker (Victoria CB Trees Real Estate Services) almost 10 years ago

Interesting & I will have to check this out when I have more time as right now, just too busy except for occasional updates which are easier via Hootsuite

Posted by Tina Gleisner, Home Tips for Women (Home Tips for Women) almost 10 years ago


Yes we do have to be careful with Facebook.  I am cautious about anything I put on facebook. 

Evelyn Kennedy, Gallagher & Lindsey, Inc. REALTORS

Posted by Evelyn Kennedy, Alameda, Real Estate, Alameda, CA (Alain Pinel Realtors) almost 10 years ago

Has anyone contacted FB to let them know the implications of this?  I've read through several of the comments and notice the same consensus, nobody likes it, but I didn't see any solutions.  If we make a group effort by all contacting FB that might make the difference in them allowing this to go on or to remove this from the system.  Just a thought.  To your success!

Posted by Scott Kearsing (Land/Home Financial Services Texas) almost 10 years ago

Great post! I think that if someone is nervous about people "seeing" the friendship, they should just block their wall from the people that may not need to see it.  I absolutely love all of the privacy control that facebook allows you to have. 

Posted by Michelle Stuart, Property Manager/Realtor (Pythias Management - Property Mgmt with a Personal Touch) almost 10 years ago


This has the potential for major fall out among people.

Posted by Eugene Adan, Carlsbad Real Estate (Adan Properties, Carlsbad, CA (760) 720-9710) almost 10 years ago

You have to go into this with the frame of mind that anything you post can be used against you.  If you are OK with it then post away.  It is not like we can claim that we didn't know the information was out there when we are the ones posting our personal stuff for the world to see.

Posted by Simon Mills (Mills Realty) almost 10 years ago

I also do not see this elusive friendship link.... should it be near the like button, mabye there is something that is turned on in yours and your friends settings.....

Posted by Elizabeth Miller (Century21 Gentry Realty) almost 10 years ago


This explains it a little better

Posted by Elizabeth Miller (Century21 Gentry Realty) almost 10 years ago

Good thread.  Most of the important points have been made.  FB has to keep the designers employed by thinking up new stuff that monetizes the site.  The company is infested with unconsciencable weenies (as Gary pointed out above).  FB doesn't listen, and FB doesn't care.  What is writ on FB is writ forever.  I worry about private messages, in spite of what FB guarantees.  I make these comments as a long-time FB user. 

Posted by Bob Jenkins (Century 21 Foothill) almost 10 years ago

Interesting to say the least.  Closed my account down months ago.  My sister also had an issue with Hacking with Porno going to her grandchildren.

She shut hers down immediately too.

Thanks for the post.

Posted by Wayne L. Brown (Franklin Advantage Inc.) almost 10 years ago

Excellent post as it is a timely reminder to treat a post to FB as something that can/will be public in some way, regardless of your privacy settings. The classic saying"think before you speak" can be updated as"think before you post"!

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Posted by Monique Ting, Your agent under the sun (INET Realty Honolulu, HI) almost 10 years ago

C-thanks for blogging about FB, I have been meaning to close my account since I heard about this feature, so thanks again for reminding me. 


Posted by Michele Engleman, SRES, San Diego Real Estate Expert (Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices) almost 10 years ago

I am very choosy as to who I "friend".  On top of that, I occassionally go through and look at all my friendships again so in case I've had a status change with one of them.  I do have a couple of "friends" that I'm not real close to, so any time I write something, I think, "Is this anything that I would tell everybody?"  That way you are safe.

Posted by Stephanie Williams, Realtor Murrells Inlet (Seaside Properties) almost 10 years ago

Very Interesting.  I had no idea!  I love reading about everyone's life but don't say much about mine.  In the future, I'll be even more careful, but will not close my account.  I do think face book should announce these things.




Posted by Margaret Neitzey (Keller Williams Realty, Pearland) almost 10 years ago

We are leaving "ourselves" open for the information that we put out there for everyone to see. I just say, let's educate people to limit the information.

Posted by Sandy McAlpine, Search Lake Norman Homes For Sale - Lake Norman NC (RE/MAX EXECUTIVE) almost 10 years ago

This is not good!  I'm sure they thought it would be cool, but really!!!!! Thanks for the heads up, Carolyn!

Posted by DeeDee Riley, Realtor - El Dorado Hills & the Surrounding Areas (Lyon Real Estate - El Dorado Hills CA) almost 10 years ago


Thanks for the tip. As a long time FBer [with 4 profiles] I keep it old-school / Jersey style ... dont write, record or post anything that isn't meant for the world to hear ! Though I did receive a disturbing letter to my Home ... from something I posted HERE on ActiveRain !!

Have a great day,

Steven Zimmerman Realtor ABR GRI / FB @ Steven.Zimmerman 

Posted by Steven Zimmerman, Husband & Father, @Gulf_Harbors Resident Realtor (Belloise Realty Tropical ) almost 10 years ago

AMEN!  I hope that says it all Carolyn.  Thanks for the insightful post ~ Brad

Posted by Brad Calef (Coco Plum Realtors) almost 10 years ago

FaceBook can be a very scary place.  You'd think sooner or later they'd figure that privacy might be an issue to some people.

Posted by Christine Donovan, Broker/Attorney 714-319-9751 DRE01267479 - Costa M (Donovan Blatt Realty) almost 10 years ago

FB may soon become a historical example of a social networking company that comits social suicide. More is NOT always better.

Posted by Kathryn Gorham, Emerald Isle NC Crystal Coast (Green Key Realty) almost 10 years ago

Wow when will they stop?

Posted by Nicholas Caron (Caron's Gateway Real Estate) almost 10 years ago

Wow, very scary! Thanks for the great post!

Posted by Susie Johannes, SFR (Keller Williams Arizona Living Realty) almost 10 years ago

I guess I don't really get it yet- but that's why I keep my business and personal FB seperate...

Posted by Trish Sarfert, Serving military & civilian relocations! (Gulf Coast Home Experts) almost 10 years ago


It is amazing the things that people can come up with. Facebook is a wonderful yet scary place all at the same time. Have a great day and thanks for this post. I was thinking the same things virtually when I was checking it out the other day.

Posted by Lisa Ludlow Archer (Live Love Homes-Keller Williams, Charlotte, NC Ballantyne Area ) almost 10 years ago

Me too!

I missed it too!

Has anyone ever gotten a lead directly from Facebook?

Posted by Tom Waite, So Cal-Apartment Bldg Investments (Thomas Waite Real Estate Broker) almost 10 years ago

I apologize, friends, but this isn't that scary.  After all, the information was already there.  Sure, it takes less time to uncover it with the tool, but it was all already publicly available.

If you don't want to let someone know something, then the post can be restricted to certain people.  If that's too much hassle, then don't post!

The idea of privacy went out the window in 1994 when Netscape introduced the browser.  And guess what? It's okay.  We're still alive.  We still have a civilized society, and in fact, the lower level of privacy has helped make scumbags more visible.

This will actually help spouses that have cheating partners, and will help parents know about their children's activities.

As agents, we live a very public life.  In fact, almost everyone does.  I think because we surf the internet from our homes that we feel we have a degree of anonymity...after all, we're at home, and that means no one is watching, right?

Nope.  Every site we go to is logged by our Internet Service Provider.  The sites we visit often log our own IP address.  Facebook is simply making what's already available to select tech experts available to everyone.

I have to pose the question: What are you afraid of people finding out?  If it's something you shouldn't be doing, then you shouldn't be doing it, right?  If it's something you want secret like a wedding proposal, then don't post it anywhere on the Internet. :)

Posted by Jonathan Rainer (RE/MAX Cutting Edge Realty) almost 10 years ago

WayWard Child...

This is going to have a domino effect. It'll go down much like Google Buzz did. Lawsuit followed by a dead buzz :)

And you know, it's not a feature we can opt out of. The best any of us can do is keep everything friends only. I have other thoughts, and ideas, but they'll make great Blog Fodder :)



Posted by "The Lovely Wife" (Broker Bryantnulls Wife) The One And Only TLW. (President-Tutas Towne Realty, Inc.) almost 10 years ago

I'm still trying to figure out all the "how to's" and ramifications of Facebook. You bring up some scary points to consider. I must learn more. Thanks for the warning.

Posted by Michael Emerson (Keller Williams Realty) almost 10 years ago

Wordy C, I've never been a big FB fan, friend or whatever...  It's there and I do enjoy staying in touch with family & friends.  But I do shutter when I read what some folks put on the Face as TLW calls it.  Just not much common sense in doing so in my mind.  But oh well, I must be wrong with all the millions of users it has!  Thanks for the heads up.

Posted by Lee & Pamela St. Peter, Making Connections to Success in Real Estate (Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices YSU Realty: (919) 645-2522) almost 10 years ago

I think the key to a decent FB experience is having decent friends and acquaintances. If you have family or personal drama going on it would be wise to think twice about what gets revealed in social media accounts.

I have been auditing all of my accounts for the last several days trying to figure out who stays and who goes. Those can be difficult decisions to make when you care about people but not their lax security habits...

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 10 years ago
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