C Tann-Starr's Outside Blog

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Weird Is...

Weird is having members of your family get on your case about not keeping in touch with other people in your family. So "they" say things like, "hey, here's a Facebook friend suggestion. Go friend 'em." So, reluctantly, you do because you don't want to make the people you care about unhappy.

Then third party family and friends start friending you because they found you through your baby brother and older sister. So you friend them back because as a recovering b*tch you have to remind yourself to be nice to people your people care about. After all, your family has an expectation (LOL).

Then you post a hello the same day you accept their friend request to you and you add a link to your blog so they can see what you've been up to while you are asking them what they have been up to. Then they delete your comment on their wall in less than two minutes while talking about how they love their family and are having a blessed day (ROTFLMAO). WTF? Did I miss something? You sent me a friend request. I said yes... You delete our first conversation which is a friendly hello and inquiry as to how you have been???

Hmm...

This is why one shouldn't always give in to Mom when she insists you need to get back in contact with people you haven't spoken to in over 20 years... Seriously. If they delete your hello what the hell is the point of friending them in Facebook or real life? I shall not be making that mistake again (LOL).

How much do you want to bet I get a shit load of e-mail behind this one if I un-friend them (LMAO). You know if you do that they, Facebook, notify the person that you did it, right? Hahahahahaaaaaaa! Should I do it? What say you? I hate squandering social media relationships and don't like wasting time with people who do not want to associate with me. I also don't like giving people access to my friend list if they don't want to be friends with me. I am not here to bump up your roster numbers people. I'm here because I like being here with you.

Will there be an update to this post? You betcha. My family actually reads me. My friends lurk here as well. Will let you know when my cell phone starts ringing (LOL). It will ring, you know... it always does... ;-)

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Comment balloon 26 commentsC Tann-Starr • November 28 2009 10:03AM

Comments

Hysterical. I'm not a big Facebook fan anyway so if I were you, I wouldn't worry about it.

Posted by Susie Blackmon, Ocala, Horses, Western Wear, Horse Farms, Marketing almost 9 years ago

It sorta looks like there is going to be some Woolite hittin' da fan pretty soon....If ya know what I mean C..

Posted by Don Rogers, Realtor, Broker, CDPE, GRI, OnullFallon MO & St Charles County MO homes (Keller Williams Realty Chesterfield) almost 9 years ago

LOL @ Susie. My Mom can be quite the Drama Queen when she gets going. Seriously (LMAO).

Don, the messages have already begun. I should embed a social media poll on one of my posts one day soon. Can you imagine the Wordy C scenarios and questions? (LOL).

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 9 years ago

Very funny. I think you summed up the dilemma with social media pretty effectively. Good luck with what Don called out as the Woolite hittin' da fan.

Posted by Dave Roberts (Healdsburg Sotheby's International Realty) almost 9 years ago

C, you are too funny!  Recovering bitch!  That sums it up for a lot of us, me included!

Posted by Patricia Kennedy, Home in the Capital (RLAH Real Estate) almost 9 years ago

Hey C.... life is too short for that bull.....if that family member and you were meant to be, you would be....don't try to reinvent the wheel.....it doesn't work....but what do I know???

  Mothers,of whichI am one with 3 grown children in their 30's, only want peace and happiness within the family.....I've learned that no one can create what is not emotionally there.

Posted by Barbara Todaro, "Franklin MA Homes" (RE/MAX Executive Realty ) almost 9 years ago

That's really odd....sounds like they had a "mom" on their end saying "you need to be friends with C" :). I'm friends with real friends....not business contacts and not my friend's children. One place to be myself....scary, huh?

Posted by Karen Fiddler, Broker/Owner, Orange County & Lake Arrowhead, CA (949)510-2395 (Karen Parsons-Fiddler, Broker 949-510-2395) almost 9 years ago

C, reading your thoughts on friending and un-friending I am glad I am the lone holdout on the planet NOT on that particular social media platform we all love and hate called Facebook. But I do see with its pace if I do decide to set up a profile and see what splats on my WALL I think I will have to keep up with it on my mobile device iPhone cause it would suck up all my time planted somewhere for hours on end at Starbucks with my laptop. You are a hoot as always!!

Posted by Gary Woltal, Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth (Keller Williams Realty) almost 9 years ago

Happy Thanksgiving C! (A little late) It is great to read about what other family's do to torment each other! It makes my family feel like the norm, crazy!

Looking foreward to the follow up blog.

Posted by Terrie Leighton, Reno Real Estate Agent ~ Selling Homes in Reno (Ferrari-Lund Real Estate ) almost 9 years ago

Hey, I wouldn't want to be where I am not wanted.  I would immediately unfriend them, but then that's me.  Maybe they had a reason, right!

Posted by Jane Peters, Connecting you to the L.A. real estate market (Home Jane Realty) almost 9 years ago

Haaaaaaa! My phone rang. Didn't take long, eh? (LOL) ;-)

Dave, I could use a lot of luck on this one (LOL).

Patricia, if there were a 12 step program I would continually fail (LOL). My relapse in the B-department is legendary (ROTFL). I am not afraid to start trippin when people flip my B-switch. Boy, did that crap flip it this morning. I keep thinking my Mom finally got me to open a dialog with this person and they reinforced the reason why I severed the ties to begin with. I shall need Hagen Daz to feel better later today when the family spreads the word I'm on the B-path again (LOL). Trust me when I say you'd prefer to deal with me while on the rag... ;-)

Barbara, this is true. I shall download a movie and chill with the wee people in a few. :-)

Karen, odd, annoying and weird. I am now wondering what i will do if they do write on my wall. Didn't hit delete because I like to have the emotion first before I make a rational decision. I'm still venting and will probably start spoofing really soon (LOL) ;-)

Gary, that is amazing. Not there yet? Hahahahahaaaaa! Let me know when you do get there. I am soooooooo friending you (LOL). ;-)

 

 

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 9 years ago

Terrie, families are a real hoot, eh? (LOL) The follow up blog is turning into quite a spoof. I've been on my cell phone for over an hour. Geez...

Jane, when ever I get an immediate urge to do something, I pause for a few seconds. My urges can get a wee bit wild (LMAO). ;-)

 

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 9 years ago

That's pretty funny!  I haven't had any problems with family members......except too much information from some of them.  At least they keep it on their own walls.....

Posted by Ann Allen Hoover, CDPE SRES ASP e-PRO Realtor - Homes for Sale - AL (RE/MAX Advantage South) almost 9 years ago

LOL @ Ann. Wasn't thinking about wall spam before and now I am (LMAO).

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 9 years ago

I'm soooo glad that I'm not on Facebook, Myspace, etc. - I don't like people much to begin with (an unfortunate side effect of my profession) and don't want to be that visible.

Posted by Jesse Skolkin (Independent New York State Certified Real Estate Appraiser) almost 9 years ago

C

As far as the b*tch comment...  you may have been a b*tch but you are the pick of the litter!

Cyber behavior is VERY interesting... sometimes I let myself get carried away with some comment that kind of hurts... then I think... I am who I am... and apply the SWSWSWN  principle... when it comes to liking me.. it is Some Will, Some Won't, So What..... Next.

As a real estate agent it is a good principle to remember and to keep a wall up so those types of things don't hurt...after 30 years of eating "Cow Pies"... I find it helps calm the consciousness.

As far as friends on facebook, twitter and linked in.. with as high a blog profile as you have.. it makes sense to just know sometimes what you say is going to make people MAD as they may not agree with your very strong opinions...... so if they unfriend you or delete your comment.. just "build a bridge and get over it"... Don't let those "drama hooks" take away from your ability to go forward with all the positive things that you do to help EVERYONE EVERY day.. you do make a difference... so someone deleting your comment should not bother you.... Some people are just plain jealous of your blog presence and maybe they did not want their friends to see you on their wall... you don't know what was in their head.. and it really doesn't matter.. just decide to walk over the bridge or burn it! 

It could  be they didn't even know what they did... many people make mistakes in social media when they are learning... so you asked.. what should you do??? Take the high road!  Leave it alone and if they unfriend you... the bridge is burned and you did not have to "kick them to the curb."

We all love you so isn't that what counts?

Posted by Carra & Shae Riley, Helping people Transition at all ages! (Brokers Guild Cherry Creek Ltd) almost 9 years ago

My Mom always tells me about people from High School and what they're doing now. I come from a very small town and most of those that went to school with are still in town. I tell my Mom that if I was supposed to know what they were up to, we would still be in touch. And yes, my Mom joined Facebook and suggests friends for me from time to time.

Posted by JL Boney, III, Columbia, SC Real Estate (Coldwell Banker) almost 9 years ago

LOL @ Jesse. An unfortunate side effect, indeed. ;-)

LMAO @ Carra. The pick of the litter, eh? Does that make me the Queen B? (ROTFLMAO) Just teasing (LOL). Thank you for the kind words. Very much appreciated. ;-)

JL, my Mom is always sharing my crap with people I don't want to share my crap with. I get that. Totally (LOL) :-)

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 9 years ago

C, unfriend away!!  Although I am on Facebook, I don't really do much with it...I don't think I really get the Facebook thing anyway...I would rather talk to friends...at least my good close friends.

Posted by Nick T Pappas, Madison & Huntsville Alabama Real Estate Resource (Assoc. Broker/Broker ABR, CRS, SFR, e-Pro, @Homes Realty Group, @HomesBirmingham & Providence Property Mgmnt, LLC Huntsville AL) almost 9 years ago

C Tann - I would definitely unfriend them.  I think so many facebook users try to obtain the most "friends" possible, but I'm the opposite.  I'm only friends with friends and family, not friends of friends or someone I met once at the gas station 10 years ago.  I might be a little strange, but I only want to know what's going on in certain peoples lives.

 

Posted by Michelle Gibson, REALTOR (Hansen Real Estate Group Inc. ) almost 9 years ago

C Tann - I have had a little too much annoyance and conflict with facebook and am ready to either pull the plug or pull back and just observe.  I think it's very hard to be everything to everybody and I finf it way too high school.

Posted by Carol Culkin, Overland Park (Reece & Nichols) almost 9 years ago

Nick, the fan page SEO does well when you are using it to link back to your blog posts. I have also been hired from Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter. :-)

Michelle, I ignore more people than accept and took a while to accept this person. I'm ambivalent (LOL). My Mom's potential protest and possible lecture is making me hesitate (LMAO).

Carol, high school hits the nail on the noggin (LOL). :-)

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 9 years ago

C Tann- I have a personal facebook account (my husband refuses) and I refuse to put my pic up. It is under my married name so my past high school friends and such can't find me just to boost their number of friends count up. I have my younger siblings as friends and some college friends (actually friends) on there only.  I now feel obligated to have a professional account on facebook but I am dragging my feet for the reasons you mention in your post.  I don't want someone else to tell me to friend someone and then feel like I should and then want to ditch them...ughhh.  The need to be politically and socially correct can get old!

Posted by Krystal Knott, Breckenridge CO Real Estate & All Summit County CO (LIV Sotheby's International Realty) almost 9 years ago

I think I would consider unfriending the person even if it means taking flack from the family.

Posted by Christine Donovan, Broker/Attorney 714-319-9751 DRE01267479 - Costa M (Donovan Blatt Realty) almost 9 years ago

CTS,

Moms know best. I've ignored a recent message and friends request from a ghost from my past. Had felt uncomfortable until I read this!  Thanks.

Posted by Irene Kennedy Realtor® in Northwestern NJ (Weichert) almost 9 years ago

Justin and Krystal I am working on my fan/business pages because if too many business associates "friend" you and keep posting business blog links Facebook will whack your personal account without warning. A few of my peeps are still in shock over this. I keep turning friend feed off yet somehow it mysteriously continues to work, embedding away (LOL).

Christine, I figured I'd do all of my un-friending after the holidays. Don't want any squabbling for Christmas (LOL). ;-)

Irene, I may have to bite my tongue about Mothers knowing best (LOL). :-)

 

Posted by C Tann-Starr (Tann Starr & Associates, Inc.) almost 9 years ago

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