My e-mail is out of control and I had to turn my cell phone off today. Seems when you write an open letter to the President people think you are a repository for their complaints, suggestions and inquiries.

Since some of my readers were kind enough to take the time to write their questions down and e-mail me their concerns, I shall return the favor and answer them here instead of individually. Thank you for reading my blog. Sam: I am not arbitrary and capricious with my sarcasm and irony. I have no problem saying exactly what I mean, so consider yourself warned. Susan Mangigian's Wordy C is about to make an appearance, so go get comfy people. Ready? Read on. I may surprise some of you with how much I really do know...

1.This is the Fannie Mae site where you can find some of those listings I did a mini-rant about. Notice how it is not a Realtor site, but a Fannie Mae site where you may conduct your REO search and go shopping for a bail-out property: HomePath.com

2. Here is where you can access Fannie Mae Mortgage Tools: Monthly Payment Calculator.

3. Here is where you can access Fannie Mae Mortgage Tools: Affordability Calculator.

4. Foreclosure Prevention information may be found here.

5. Yes, I can do REOs and Short Sales. Call me in the office to set up a listing appointment at 718-483-7339 if it regards a Brooklyn or Queens property. If the property is not located in Kings or Queens County, please do not call me to represent your REOs and Short Sales. I have little minions that need my attention and I like to stay close to home and my kids. My family comes first. It is a personal preference that I have grown less flexible on. :-)

6. The HomePath Mortgage Financing lender official lists may be found here.

7. REAL ESTATE BROKERS AND APPRAISERS WHO WANT TO BE A HOMEPATH FANNIE MAE VENDOR CLICK HERE (LOL).

8. Here is the reason why I am gently ranting: "Vendor Application Process: We only add vendors for our NPDC when there is a need. If we already have an available vendor, we will not add additional vendors. However, if we have a property in an area where there is no vendor available, we will review applications for new vendors." WTF? Does the word MONOPOLY mean anything to you friggin' people? Seriously... Everyone should get a crack at it. EVERYONE! There are businesses in my industry closing their doors for lack of work and you want to give away Fannie Mae bail-out territories? If you have an available vendor you are not going to add additional vendors? Is that double-talk code speak for Realtors need not apply we're giving it to our friends? Who picks and how do they select the VENDORS? Hmm... seems to me if you give a firm work, you should move to the next firm on the list and keep 'em rotating so we all share in the opportunity (or as many professionals as possible)... I would rather see 10,000 firms land contracts to sell 100,000 homes than 1,000 firms selling 100,000 homes. That's just me...

9. BTW, if "they" don't pick your vendor application, then the Realtor has to re-apply in two years... Does this mean when a VENDOR gets an area they have that puppy on lock down for TWO YEARS? WTF!?! A little help here Fannie Mae... seriously! How come you don't define what an area is? Is it a five mile radius? A zip code? Why so weird and mysterious all of a sudden? Is there a cap for how many homes a firm can sell before you move on to the next firm to spread the opportunity for workers to work?

10. Realtors who don't have Microsoft Office better go buy Excel. The Fannie Mae tech people didn't do the application as a PDF file. Noooo buddy-buddy. That would make way too much sense and we can't be convenient and transparent while redistributing all of that wealth around. Geez... It appears that somebody thought it would be a real hoot to make you have to open the application in a Microsoft Office Excel 97-2003 workbook file. Go figure... I don't know why I keep updating my software when the government keeps making me backtrack older versions to deal with their technological lag. Not being user friendly on purpose is two thumbs down. To think I've been sporadically picking on HUD's periodic lack of common sense all of this time (LOL). Fannie Mae has inspired me to mini-rant on this issue. I'm into equal opportunity spankings people. They dropped the ball with that point. Seriously. ;-)

11. Realtors and Appraisers, if you are not an Owner/Officer you can not fill out the application. So before the appraisers, sales agents and associate brokers start doing the snoopy dance, I regret to inform you you've got to be the broker in charge or a corporate officer of the firm. A vendor equals the Firm or a Sole Proprietor. They want your EIN. Need I say more?

12. Appraisers, yes, there really is an application for you. It's the same one. Seriously (LOL). Go get that puppy and fill it out if you are interested. Just remember the Owner/Officer rule. If you are a company of one, then hurry up and get busy bay-bay! You have to e-mail the application in. E-mailing it is mandatory. :-)

13. Fannie Mae Q&A regarding them selling homes can be found here. My darling public, this is a very good page of information for you to wrap your brain around. The bail-out bad debt properties will be up for grabs and they let you make arrangements for bulk purchases. What does that mean? Hell if I know. Maybe you should just take me literally there. Since you need to learn all you can about that and other points you may want to Google HomePath and keep reading  because the rules will shift as we go along. After all, that's what the Gov does. Make sure you read the entire Q&A. It is a short but interesting list.

14. Fannie Mae is swamped, which may explain some of their hypothetical stupidity. I encourage you to help them. Here's what and who they need: * appraisers, * real estate brokers/listing agents, * repair contractors, * eviction attorneys, * maintenance companies, and * closing agents/title companies. Wishing you well on securing your tentative two year slots. I have provided you with the links, get your paperwork in and start moving that inventory.

In the meantime I am going to be making a stink and carrying on about that two year stint. The rotation should have been truncated to allow more firms to participate in the program and nip nepotism, cronyism and I'm a contributor to your Political PACS sooooo hook me up crap in the bud.

Question: How many VENDORS get to populate an area? Where's the freaking grid so we can see how many vendors own a territory of bail-out REO business?

Question: How do we find out the ratio of properties to each company? What if vendor A only gets one home while vendor B gets one thousand? This set up whomps! I want to know where the transparency is in all of this. Who rates the vendors and determines if they are doing a decent job or need to be replaced. Where is the standard check list on evaluating performance? Inquiring minds want to know...We all have bills to pay and want an opportunity to move some bail-out REO inventory and install those For Sale signs on location. BTW, they have special promotional signs and material we have to buy to do this. Making more money off of us, eh? My Realtor sign not good enough so I gotta go hang your sign too? It appears so if I want to participate...

Now you know why I said what I said. More professionals will be out in the cold than included. That totally whomps! I thought you guys wanted to create more jobs? Making me wait two years for the possibility of being selected for work after you've selected someone ahead of me doesn't seem too promising to me... There are better ways of spreading the work around and it makes me wonder who benefits the most from this arrangement. Obviously the scales are tipped in an unbalanced direction for a reason. I'm gonna have to yell now. I want to feel better... Maybe if I virtually yell someone of influence will hear me.

(A) EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE A SHOT AT MAKING SOME MONEY.

(B) THE PUBLIC NEEDS AFFORDABLE QUALITY HOUSING!

(C) IT SHOULD BE A MONTHLY LOTTERY ASSIGNING GROUPS OF INVENTORY SO NO ONE BUSINESS CAN WIPE THE FLOOR WITH THE OVERWHELMING MAJORITY OF US LOCKED OUTSIDE LOOKING IN WISHING WE WERE SHARING IN AN OPPORTUNITY TO WORK ON THIS PROJECT.

(D) MORE FIRMS PARTICIPATING WOULD FOSTER COMPETITION AND CREATE INCENTIVES TO DO WELL.

(E) HAVING TO WAIT TWO YEARS TO MAYBE GET A CRACK AT SELLING SOME OF THE BAIL-OUT REO INVENTORY IS RIDICULOUS. IT MAKES ME THINK POLITICIANS STILL WANT TO HOARD THE HOUSING INVENTORY AND NOT MOVE IT BACK INTO THE PUBLIC'S POSSESSION BECAUSE POLITICOS WITH ANOTHER AGENDA ARE NOT WILLING TO USE EVERY AVAILABLE RESOURCE TO DO SO.

WHAT THE HELL WERE THEY THINKING?

I know what I am thinking...  This limited vendor plan whomps. We should compete for that business in an open, transparent market. We all deserve a shot to earn a living.

Before I go, I want the public to know that they sell 'em as is, maybe making a repair here and there, but Fannie Mae will not repair the majority of the REOs, SO BUYERS BEWARE! Get yourself a good buyer's broker to represent your best interests in hunting for REO properties and processing your paperwork. Have lots of fun window shopping at the site and stop freaking out in my e-mail account. This is not the end of the world and real estate markets will do what ever they are going to do regardless how any of us personally feel about it.

I have to go finish writing my letter to the President now... Maybe I'll mini-rant again later. So many issues, so little time... :-)

I love when my kid gets that look of Eureka and the light-bulb goes off and you can just feel the excitement bubbling forth regarding a good idea. I've had some interesting e-mail and decided to answer it in public rather than write people individually. For the record, I think that AmeriDream, other DPAs and H.R. 600 are great ideas and I am tired of people pissing on DPA companies as if all DPAs did something wrong or contributed the bulk of the problems regarding the collapse of the housing market.

What a load of crap. There were a lot of good companies out there and I lost several very nice buyers because of the hypothetical stupidity of known and unknown peeps of HUD looking for a housing scapegoat and screwing around with the rest of us (possibly because of their personal peeves). There. I said it... some wont speak their minds, but I will (so what else is new? LOL).

I'm gonna talk about AmeriDream because several of my former prospects completed the program but didn't buy homes before the cut off date. Bummer... I believe legislation needs to be passed so that AmeriDream and other DPAs are renewed and supported in their efforts to educate families and help them obtain a home. I like those programs and want them back. They did not cost us taxpayers money and consistently generated revenue, so I don't think I am the only one who does want to see their return.

Here's a picture of my 7 year old Autistic son getting a bright idea in school after putting on his "thinking cap." I'm firing off this post because I keep wondering what his life will be like when he gets older and I pray that he'll be able to afford and maintain a home of his own one day. What we do now will effect his future and every generation to come after him. It's time for DC to get a bright idea because we can't keep doing what we're doing and not crash the economy further. This political game of sticking a virtual dunce cap on the opposing party when ever they do not agree has got to stop. Whacking the DPAs was a bad move. HUD is supposed to be for us, not against us and the fact that officials in HUD pushed for this puts a bad taste in my mouth. Sour grapes is when you loose in court and introduce naughty legislation to get what you want anyway while a significant portion of the public is cyber-screaming, "don't do it, save the program..." My son has no gile, he doesn't understand the gray areas, he only understands on and off, black and white, right and wrong and approaches life with the simple trust of a child. I'm going to take a page from his book and trust that someone more influential than I will read this. Nothing like planting an idea seed (LOL). 

Here's an idea: We have a shot at saving former DPA programs like the one AmeriDream administers. BTW, I love this company. I really do. They take the time to educate their buyers and know how to generate excitement about being a first time buyer. :-)

Did you know that AmeriDream is a 501(c)(3) charity? Yup. It's true. They are not some fly-by-night company either. This charity was established in 1999 to provide housing-related programs to low and moderate income individuals and families. (I got that info from directly from them, so don't argue with me.)

AmeriDrea has a cool mission statement that in sum and substance states the following, "Our mission is to permit qualified aspiring homeowners, a disproportionate number of whom are first-time home-buyers, minorities, legal immigrants, women headed households, and single-parents, achieve and sustain home-ownership." That is very cool. I am working with people who fit that general profile.

Did you know that AmeriDream has provided "critical down payment assistance to over 250,000 low and moderate income homebuyers," enabling them to purchase their homes without using any taxpayer dollars?

In addition, AmeriDream has educated over 60,000 home-buyers through our home-buyer education course. It has also been reported that this company (a) has counseled and assisted approximately 1,200 people to retain their home when confronted with mortgage difficulties; (b) built 168 affordable housing units in inner cities; and as of this writing (c) has reportedly committed over $30 million to projects unrelated to its down payment assistance program. Hmm... How cool is that? Friggin' awesome!

Don't believe me? Ask their President Ann Ashburn. Bet you'll get an earful and the documentation to back it up. I dare you to read it all (LOL). People love to argue, always want proof, then when you hand them a whole lot of paper they start making excuses as to why they didn't or can't read it all. Congress had access to proof, yet somebody managed to squeeze in this whack-a-DPA-mole-litigation-that-I-lost-issue into the bail-out bill.

WTF? Too many pages? Thought we'd never notice? Did HUD really believe we wouldn't find out about this until it was too late? Public wins round one, HUD wins round two, now we're battling over round three, spending mad money to fix something that never should have been broken anyway. When we, the public, did read it and started to complain, politicos put a dunce cap on our heads while they played politics and killed one of my favorite programs, making it even more difficult for me to make a living in a slow housing market spiraling into hell... Well, people like me don't just go away, especially when people like me invest some of our life savings into learning a new profession and dedicate a significant portion of time and talent trying to make a living at it. The public is here to stay as well, so we have lots of questions no one really wants to answer because they'd have to admit things they do not want to admit.

Mini-Rant time: What the hell were the politicians thinking to kill this type of program? Seriously...

Inquiring minds want to know because it just plain didn't help things. Please don't Bush-bash and think this is an answer. I really want to know why HUD was a bad dog with a naughty bone about this. Did losing in court for changing the rules piss someone off so bad they felt the need to legislate a back door victory with the a little help from their friends? The Club of 100 is pretty exclusive. Maybe we should make friends as well. Wonder if we can get a Senator to answer us? Hmm... What the hey, lets write everybody! I'm gonna start with the President and work my way down (LOL).

Wanna have some fun trying to get answers while putting those programs back? Go write your own posts on the subject and then re-blog each other like crazy. Time to trigger President O's Google alerts, people. Dude is into social media. Wanna write a letter with me? Better yet, send out postcards. You'll save on postage stamps (LOL). I'm into instant gratification, so I'm gonna blog about it and raise virtual hell because I am tired and I want what I want... which is to make a decent living and for someone in Washington to listen to the majority of regular folk when they are begging pretty please, don't help kill our industry while you experiment on paper and ignore our realities. By The People For The People has been on the back burner lately. We'd like that part of our American lives back. It may not be perfect, but it's what we do and how we are supposed to roll in the USA. Let's find out who really reads these things, shall we? (LMAO)

President Barack Obama

The White House 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C. 20006

Dear Mr. President,

I'm gonna quote ya and get real plain spoken about how I feel: “We need to move past the stale arguments that say low-income Americans shouldn’t even try to own a home,” is one of my favorite things that you said BUT DID YOU MEAN IT?

Got news for you. I'm a Realtor, I like your quote and I want you to know that we are depending on you to help make it right. This market seriously sucks and since I'm bleeding money rather than making boat loads like those ponsi-pricks who stole millions in the stock market, that would make me a low-income American with an attitude.

Once upon a time I was middle class but now I've no idea what you'd call me. Don't care, in that flippant-not-quite-true-way people do when they're angry, want to save face, rant for a minute then move on. Obviously I care because I am writing an open letter. What I care about is the fact that a lot of us are suffering and you all (on behalf of the American people to save our banks) just purchased a bunch of bad property debts that need to be put back on the housing market and sold to the public in a responsible way. Ironically, you are the virtual-head of the USA landlord business, so as a Realtor I am asking you to remember us struggling folk trying to make a living in this slow a$$ market. This market whomps! Seriously.

Do ask your real estate banking gurus to do the right thing by taking those Fannie Mae properties and putting them in the hands of us local professionals who want to work with local buyers and get families back into those homes. My mortgage buddies, inspector pals and appraisers would love to have more to do. Our businesses are slowly closing from lack of activity which means your job loss statistics are rising. The tenants who have been paying their rents for years and were shocked to discover themselves homeless because of foreclosures should get something for their troubles (rent with the option to buy, perhaps? We can help you with that... just give us a chance). The multiple bail-out from hell was a solution that cost us taxpayers some serious money. We want to have a part in this since we helped to pay for it. Affordable housing is a serious issue and the public now has a chance to purchase affordable housing if you place the properties on the market in a responsible way and publish the schedules.

I guess my supporting no cost bipartisan legislation in Congress (H.R. 600) to reauthorize and reform down-payment assistance programs funded in part by sellers, also known as DPA, which expired under federal law last year is a start. I think doing a monthly lottery for brokerage firms and independent brokers to help sell Fannie Mae bad debt properties is another solution. 

Ann Ashburn states it best: "DPA funding from qualified non-profits helped more than one million creditworthy families and individuals become homeowners from 1998 to 2008, and generated $24 billion in economic activity in just a five year period alone, according to a 2007 study by George Mason University’s Center for Regional Analysis." We all had a hand in helping to generate those numbers so I think you could use a good team of companies networking together to move those properties all across the USA. Holding on to them after the tax payers have paid for them makes me wonder what else is going on back there...

We are counting on you, Mr. President.

Notice the lack of flowery speech? Notice no kudos and congrats fawning here. Just a simple statement. We are counting on you... BTW, I really do wish you well with your new administration and will be praying for you, however, I am a struggling mom trying to make ends meet with two learning disabled kids who are very expensive so you will not be getting a free ride when I write you open letters. I don't collect Social Security for them, I pay for everything. They are not on Medicare. I lay out $495 per month so they can have health insurance. Do you have any idea how many fees and dues I've gotta pay to be a Realtor? I have lots of bills so this legislation matters to me. The majority of Realtors are not independently wealthy, and I think the public needs to hear this and so do you.

Mr. President, I live in New York City. Do you know what the rents go for over here? My knickers are in a twist because while people in DC play at redistributing the bad-debt-wealth, the rest if us are trying to keep the lights on and put food on the table wondering what new bill we have to foot for you before we can pay for what we owe here. That pending bill is supposed to help us, right? Well, we're waiting... We don't want it pending we want it passed! Everyone knows those properties are worth something, yet no one knows just how little or much. I say it's time to find out in a very transparent way. They should be put on a time table and open to public sale.

We want relief and we want help so we can work and earn our living in the real estate industry. Releasing those properties to people who want to purchase a home would be a lovely start towards returning our tax money back to the coffers. The public wants to purchase affordable homes and we want our industry to survive and not have it inadvertently stolen from us by a handful of people slowly creating a government brokerage house so they can property manage our housing misfortunes into a fresh new hell born from good intentions that routinely create unintended consequences.

Wanna do a new thing and be a bank and landlord? Fine. Just keep us in the loop so we can help keep the game honest. After all, we're not running for office and we don't care about the polls. We care about feeding and protecting our families and keeping a roof over out heads while helping other families obtain their own roof to enjoy.

There are some people in DC who do not want us there while they create their version of the USA-Landloard-Bank-Brokerage-Division of Fannie Mae. I'm not one to make political rants, but I smell something rotten burning from hell here and I'm calling a spade a spade regarding the virtual stench from the greed trench. We don't have a union so inviting an association or two isn't fair if you are not a member of that particular club. A website where we can weigh in would be nice. Take your own survey from the public and real estate professionals. I do not like where the Internet chatter has been going with this, which is why I am putting my two cents in: Put some Builders, Inspectors, Appraisers and Realtors on that task force Mr. President. Get some input from us little folk who actually do the work, suffer the disappointments and know what we wish we could fix. Seriously... There is no theory here, only experience and issues that need to be addressed fairly... (Yes, I am a Donald Trump fan, so you should call him. He's very plain spoken. Get people who are not Yes-people to help you here. Do a new thing with this new problem you're having.)

I'll repeat a previous factoid because it is such a good point: from 1998 to 2008 DPAs reportedly generated $24 billion in economic activity in just a five year period alone...

Now imagine what would happen if Realtors got together in 2009 with AmeriDream (and other DPA programs) and moved that bad inventory the talking heads in Washington want to hoard and keep you tangled up as a landlord over? You want to get this economy started? Let us do our thing and move that inventory. Stop writing policy the size of a phone book when you can use the laws you already have. Make a monthly lottery if you have to, just give us a shot at moving the inventory. You, the USA Government, owns it now, which means the Government can start collecting closing monies and put our tax funds back into the virtual coffers they belong in by gently releasing the bad-debt Fannie Mae bank owned properties into the marketplace for sale to the public. That property has to be made available for everyone. I would hate to think that my Autistic and PDD-NOS little minions have more common sense than ____ when it comes to this issue. My kids already think they are Realtors. I take them everywhere. I would love to take them to an open house at a government released property for sale to the public. That would be mad cool.

Please pass the legislation and let us do our jobs, Mr. President. Release the bail-out housing inventory back into the public for sale where it belongs. What the hell does Fannie Mae need a portfolio of bad debt for? Seriously! Inquiring minds want to know...

Who knows, the government might even make a profit if we sell enough of it off... I hear Social Security has a lot of IOUs waiting to be paid off (LOL).

Update: My girlfiend Julie has a question for you: Mr. President why haven't you released some funds to the USDA which still offers 100% financing so that all the buyers I have with loans that are approved but are not funded could close? Why offer a program that you choose to fund when it suits you?

Respectfully submitted,

Carolyn Tann-Starr

ActiveBrad was kind enough to make this available for a re-blog.

Considering the fact that I "broke" the ClubChaosAgents.com team blog for a couple of days I thought it would be useful to point out the fact that you can not use special characters like "@" when you are sending out your team blog initiations (ROTFL). Seriously! ;-)

My kids are a trip. Noah is turning seven in a few days. The older he gets the more he regresses. Stephen's a bad influence on him. It appears that Applied Behavior Analysis works both ways... Who knew a precocious two tear old could cause so much havoc?

Step is going to be three in a few months. Seriously. I wonder what that will be like. Little dude thinks throwing my cell phone out the window is a toddler sport. Bad enough my calculators are taking baths in the toilet but now the sound of miniature LCD television displays taking a dive has caught his fancy. It doesn't shatter. It makes a peculiar soft yet reverberating "kquish" sound when you drop one from the fifth floor. Then there's the crisp crack of impact from the casing shattering apart and electronics skipping across the roof top of the garage as a tinkle of excitement.

Makes you think something just took a bashing. There is always that strange moment of silence as if everyone in the complex paused to think WTF was that? Happens every time. (Yup. I've suffered multiple crushing, inclusive of miniature DVD players.)

Seriously. Little dude used to drop a lego block or two, but that's not fun for him anymore. Now it's cell phones. My son runs through electronics like some people run through toilet paper. I am bleeding money trying to stay wireless, on-line and entertained. I like my business toys and so does my 2.8 year old. The constant destruction is getting kind of depressing...

Hubby tried to cheer me up with a TomTom for Christmas. Didn't want me getting lost and figured I could save some paper from the map-quest fest. Turns out I'm not happy because now I have to sleep with one eye open to keep the minion blur from floating my TomTom in the toilet or sending it five flights to a spectacular doom. My GPS is a lot more delicate than my cell phone. Woe is me... TomTom should have a chat with Samsung...

I am a die hard Samsung fan. Our Samsung phones have taken numerous beatings, yet somehow managed to survive Stephen the Minion Blur.

They have floated in the toilet. They have taken a bath. They have showered. They have hidden in the toaster. They have materialized from the microwave and freezer. The first time he chucked mine out the window, we managed to find all of the pieces and snap it back together again. I was so distraught, my hubby had to do it for me and we were both amazed when the cracked phone continued to work flawlessly. Unfortunately, the last time my kid chucked my cell phone out the window it hit a patch of ice and the LCD was no more. My sound bit the dust as well and we couldn't find all of the pieces to snap it back together again. It still powered up and vibrated when ever someone called me, so I took the hubby's phone and ran to the Sprint store begging for help to save my contacts before it died completely. Problem was, if they transferred my info into his phone, he would loose his info. Bummer. I was now forced to buy a new phone, which was not in my budget. I only had $80 on me and we had $150 phones (LOL). The chick there didn't give a shit but the guy was awesome. He told the manager about my kid and the manager said I could have a phone that did all the things my old phone did for $50. I went straight for the Samsung Rant in a cool fire engine red. Mommy always has either a red or silver phone. Dad gets all the other colors (LOL).  

Sprint is all digital. There is no sim card. If they steal your phone and you shut it down they can't reactivate and use it. Nice, eh? I didn't know they had wireless back up either. Didn't have it before, but I do now. It took a major effort to retrieve my contacts and I will never not back up my phone data ever again. I really believe if I had a different phone all would have been lost a couple of days ago. Sansung is amazing. I wish I knew who to talk to about making a minion proof phone... I should send them my kid to work in their testing area. I bet they'd learn a lot in one day (LOL). I can't believe my new phone has so many cool features. I added new stuff and it was cheaper than my old plan. :-)

There is a bit of irony in this. My bad little minion did a good thing inadvertently. I got a rebate that cancels out the price of the phone, I've got more minutes, a better plan and an awesome phone. There is another point of order in the irony department: I have a Samsung Rant but I don't know how to use it. Seriously! I have got to change that damn ring-tone! I'm being hip-hopped to death with this teeny-bopper whispery cool snippet of a song that is popular but so not me  (LMAO). I am 43 years old getting picked up by kids thinking I'm not that old (ROTFL). Since when did ring-tones = invitation to rap? Is it me? Did I miss something vital here? Duh?

I am sitting here staring at my two fave toys that I do not know how to use. I am wondering where the hell I am going to hide them from my kids so I can go to sleep tonight. My little dudes get into everything and they will sit with my keys and try every single one because they understand that keys unlock stuff. We are freaking out trying to figure out how the two of them manage to open so many things. Maybe I should duck tape my phone and TomTom to the ceiling in a freezer bag. After all, they are both too short to reach it but will probably start jumping in the bed in their best efforts to try. They always give everything their best effort, especially when mischief and mayhem are afoot.

Parenting a PDD-NOS two tear old kid can be tough. Parenting a six year old with Autism pretending to be a PDD-NOS two year old is no joke either... You should see the two of them fighting over my new phone. They watch the Disney channel on it all the time. Sometimes it is the only way I can keep them both in the bed and focused on trying to go to sleep. Sprint TV is turning out to be their fave night light. :-)

My friend Jeff Belonger was kind enough to make this available for a re-blog. This is a very important issue affecting our industry and I am rooting for the return of the seller funded down payment assistance programs. Nehemiah worked wonders in New York City and I definitely want these programs back. 

I need an appraiser for two of my buyers, so I started poking around looking for a few candidates. While doing a bit of recreational reading I stumbled across this quote:

"No later than October 1, 2009, all FHA appraiser roster appraisers in all states and territories must be state certified in order to be eligible to conduct appraisals for FHA-insured mortgages and remain on the FHA Appraiser Roster. Commencing October 1, 2009, all FHA-approved lenders must use state certified appraisers for FHA-insured mortgages."

Here's the link to the full article:

http://www.workingre.com/workingre/fha-appraising-who-qualifies.html

I found myself wondering if I ever asked anyone if they were state certified. I think I just assumed it was a given and was rudely awakened to the fact that it may not be as automatic as I thought. It appears I have been caught assuming and taking this "fact" for granted. I confess and apologize. I'm sharing this because a few of you may have had the same assumption that I did. I'm glad that it will be mandatory Oct 2009 and so far have been using state certified professionals by the luck of the draw (LOL). The possibility of not using one just never occurred to me. I didn't know they existed... I was soooo not paying attention to that one.

I have to say I am very happy to be so exhausted (LOL). Who knew my new clients would keep me up well past minion bedtime time? :-)

First time buyers can be very interesting. This young couple was so gung ho to find a house they went out in 20 degree weather during a snow storm to attend three open houses (LOL). Then they contacted the person who gave me the referral and said they wanted to make an offer. Of course that lead to a very interesting conversation which had me gently fussing at them and caused me to call several other clients to remind them not to go shopping without their Realtor (LMAO). This is a tough market. I don't care how bad the weather gets. Buyers, do not leave your Realtors at home, okay?

I got back in at approximately 4:02 AM this morning, joked on Twitter about Stephen the Minion Blir throwing my cell phone out the window (5 floors down to smasheroo people) and announced that I now have a cool Samsung Rant in fire engine red. My phone was temporarily disconnected during the drama of activating a new one, but that story is another blog post. :-)

By the way, my new buyers (seven days into the relationship) have made an offer on a nice home. Wish me luck. I'm gonna need it. The listing agent is not returning my phone calls... Geez... This is a very gentle mini-rant. If I don't hear from them soon Wordy C may show up later spitting virtual nails (LOL).

Real Estate Pro Magazine did an RSS feed re-cap on Inman entitled, "Bloggers share their experiences from Connect NYC ‘09." I got to check out some interesting posts that I missed. I figured I would share the link with you guys while I take a break from creating a new MeMe for my gal pal Elayna. It would be a lot easier if I wasn't still chasing a little late night minion. Stephen is knocked out with his Dad but Noah is in YouTube mode and I can't seem to keep him in the bed. Little Dude loves the computer almost as much as his Mama. I think that's a good thing. Sleep would be nice too... Seriously. :-)

You can check out the post here:

http://realestatepromag.com/?p=34

I love The Learning Channel. Did you know that TLC has a hit series entitled, "Moving Up" and they need our collective help? It appears they are on the hunt for Realtors to assist them in finding buyers and sellers to cast in their show's programming.

Hmm... I guess my Meme procrastination may turn out to be useful after all (LOL). While doing a bit of recreational reading in a desperate attempt to avoid thinking about how I plan to escape my new version of cyberHell, curtesy of the lovely Elayna Fernandez, I discovered that TLC is currently casting for the fourth season of Moving Up and had the most deliciously wicked idea of how to get you Meme Maggots back. I am tagging you all for show submissions bay-bays. So pay attention to the TLC Moving Up MeMe Rules (ROTFL)

One cool thing to note is the fact that the show is being hosted by Trading Spaces star Doug Wilson. Although a majority of the shows will be filmed in New York, it is not an exclusive location so you all need to get busy and try to make some extra money with your favorite clients. How cool is that? Spanking-A-Awesome! Well, maybe except for the Meme Maggots I am about to tag because they have to post their choices and reasoning for their selections in public on their blogs (LOL). If you play along with this MeMe you have to select a seller for your blog post. (You can choose as many people/sellers/buyers you want with the TLC contest, that is a separate issue and none of our business.)

BTW, you are gonna have to submit a picture of the seller's house on your AR MeMe to get out of your cyberHell - so pick someone good to compliment (LOL). You know the ones I'm talking about. The interesting ones with personality you actually talk about to go with that house you're trying to sell (LMAO). Don't drag your feet because this MeMe has an expiration date! It ends July 2009, so I am actually being kind because it wont last forever (LOL).

See, this is what you get when you tag someone for a MeMe who said STOP TAGGING ME. At least my version of fresh hell might sell your house and get your blogger's butt on television. Seriously! So go get busy and monetize your blogs people. ;-)

Regarding TLC and "Moving Up," I can not speak for the previous years but I do know that for 2009 they have created a lovely incentive to get more members of our industry to cooperate and promote their show's efforts to provide interesting buyers and sellers for the public to watch.

Note:

(1) Realtors who help TLC find people who are cast in the show will receive a finder’s fee, paid by TLC.

(2) Realtors also receive a credit at the end of each episode.

(3) TLC requires (a) outgoing, (b) opinionated couples or individuals (c) who are selling their current home and are in contract for a new one, or (d) are currently renters and are buying a home.

(4) They must have plans to move sometime between end of February to July 2009.

EXTREMELY IMPORTANT: "Interested candidates must still occupy their current home. Buyers moving into a home that is already vacant are not eligible. These folks must have big plans to renovate the home that they are buying or strong ideas on how they will dramatically alter the décor of their new house."

If you know someone that you think would be great for the series, please contact Rebecca directly at the phone number and/or email below:

Rebecca Chaikin Casting Director BBC Worldwide Americas T: 212-974-9050 x210 F: 212-974-9323 EM: rchaikin@bbcnyproduction.com 432 West 45th Street 3rd Floor New York, NY 10036

Check out this link also:

http://tlc.discovery.com/fansites/movingup/movingup.html

Now it's time for my victim's initiation into MeMe cyberHell. I TAG THE FOLLOWING REALTORS FOR THE TLC MOVING UP MEME:

Melody Botting (TX) (For tagging my a$$ at Christmas - LOL)

Susan Mangigian (PA) (Just because I'm gonna see you in two weeks and it'll make my visit very interesting - LMAO)

Richard Weisser (GA) (Dear Richard, you are a dear, now go monetize your blog, bay-bay.)

Julie Chapman (GA) (I hope you do more than new construction. I think you do and would love to hear from the Triple Julies regarding who they nominate as an interesting seller for TLC. :-)

Elizabeth Weintraub (CA) (The idea of it was just too much fun for me. I can't wait to see who you pick - LOL)

Adam Waldman (NY) (You're in New York, bay-bay! What the hey! I can't tag myself. Ya gotta represent - LOL)

I love you guys and I wont mind if you decline to play, so don't stress out about this. If you are not going to have fun, don't do it.  Everybody thank Elayna for getting me started with a new Meme from hell (LMAO). E, I will post your Meme later on tonight sweetie. I promise. Love, C.

Jon was kind enough to make this available for a re-blog. As I read this I thought about Club Chaos and our team writing projects, the launch of Little Minion TV on Active Rain and the direction we want to take with The Outside Blog Minion Report and our developing Team Blog.

There are so many opportunities waiting to be explored here at Active Rain. Those numbers are phenomenal and are a direct resut of the collective efforts of over 128,890 professional members working with the Active Rain Real Estate Network. There is something to be said for playing nice in the electronic sand box. The search engines wouldn't drive that much traffic here if it wasn't for the content of our blog posts. I got an e-mail from Autralia the same day I posted my kid's little video on Shea Stadium and Citi Field. I'm very happy to report that it's going viral on the Internet. I can't wait to see what happens when I post Stephen the Minion Blur at the Uni-sphere. :-)

My advice: create more original content and be very careful how you decide to brand your name and develop your (a) blogs, (b) trade marks and (c) service marks. You and your creations are very valuable to the community and this wonderful network. Market reports are not the only reason a person will decide to pick up the phone and call you.

Do not squander your social media opportunities. Blogging is a significant part of my business plan and if you just made a profile but don't spend any time here, you need to think again. The next time someone tells you (a) I don't have time for that or (b) you are wasting your time creating blog posts, send them over to read what Jon has to say on the subject. Show them the latest analytics and statistics. Tell them your friend Carolyn was out of the office yesterday and had 19 messages come in about making potential business arrangements, inclusive of four referrals from Active Rainers. How did the other 15 find me? My blog.

Because of the Active Rain Real Estate Network I now need a Minion sitter (LOL). Yo - I'm just sayin'... ;-)

My Tweet-peep @AutismFamily really has it going on. Not only is she a cool editor in real life, she's a very sweet person who shares really neat websites. Check this one out: http://mombloggers.ning.com/group/amazonassociates

It belongs to the MomBloggerClub. It's a small group of really cool mommies who love to blog. The members of the AR Mommy Bloggers writing team is going to go join. We think it will be fun and invite you to come take a peek at this small group of very interesting women.

You can also check out Bonnie Sayers, the editor of "Bella On-line:The Voie of Women" here. When you have little minions like mine, you need all the help you can get (LOL). I love her website, so if you are not following my Tweet-peep, you may want to go check her out on Twitter here. :-)

I was pleasantly surprised to discover Trulia.com was the Topic Sponsor for the Active Rain Channel "Outside Blog Minion Report." (P.S. Sponsor ads can rotate - LOL) We've been working diligently to get our future Team Blogs in place and the Rainers I am currently working with are helping me carefully audit and create the rules regarding the direct relationships between Little Minion TV and the OBMR. We have a vision for the Outside Blog Minion Report and hope to turn it into a viable e-zine down the road. I've two brick and mortar sponsors for the project. There's no telling how many more may be interested in the future, so I have to do my homework now and improve the quality of my content this very moment.

Here's our writing team's Active Rain Channel created exclusively for hosting the content for this project:

http://activerain.com/action/channels/activerain/topics/outside_blog_minion_report

We started the project late in October of 2008, so we have a long way to go. I'm working with 5 writers and am having a blast thinking up things to do with our kids. We want them to participate in what we're doing. We can, and have already created a few CDs, DVDs and PDFs of our pet writing projects, so there is a lot of graphic design going on in my apartment. Those were test runs, but now it is time to get serious.

You too can create Active Rain channels for your group writing projects. All you have to do is create something that you really want to do. It wont work if you hate it. It wont work if you whine about spending the money because you want everything to be free. It will only work if you put enough into it to get something out of it. You should get together with your friends and purchase an Active Rain Team Outside Blog for $79 a month if you and your team can consistently post what you deem to be relevant content. Don't do it until you have ground rules and an administrative policy in place.

Team blogging takes dedication and discipline. The writers have to write. Once you and yours establish the ground rules the goal is to begin building content specifically to populate that blog and keep that content coming. It may require you to skip your favorite wordless post because your words are your bread and butter. It is how you plan to be paid. If you are clueless to the publishing game but think you may like to exercise that option, feel free to go join the Active Rain Groups: Seth Godin Fan Club and Donald Trump Fans. They are new, small, but very useful. We're cooking up some fun and the founder is awesome at marketing. We're going to be using DT & SG marketing strategies to potentially monetize our outside blogs.

What I am doing here is an example of conducting a mild inception/feasibility study. I'm creating original content with specificity and looking for a particular home to park it in. I'm discovering what does and does not work for me. Localism and Outside Blogs are where I want to be. They have tremendous potential and have already opened other doors that I never anticipated.

Do not squander your social media. There is value in your bogging. You are going to have to decide what is best for you.

Where do you want to be? What do you want to do with your writing? While you think about that, here is a little video eye candy from my 6 year old. Mama is trying to teach her baby how to film, take pictures, then edit. He likes playing with the cameras and I enjoy seeing what he sees so I have turned it into a very interesting family game. Very shaky, but not a bad start. Little dude has a lot of potential. I'm looking forward to his help and company on a few more excursions. When you have kids involved, auto-focus is a beautiful thing (LOL). We're having a lot of fun with this. The Outside Blog Minion Report and Little Minion TV from The Mind Of Minion (M.C.N.S.Starr). Our tag line: "The little minions host fun, cool, think and do tours of New York City neighborhoods and Team Blog about their adventures on the Active Rain Real Estate Network and Localism." Google has been kind to us and so have our readers.

I was fortunate to meet Ines Hegedus-Garcia at Inman and she wrote a beautiful post entitled, "Taking Your On-line Efforts Offline (Part I)" that you can read at AgentGenius.com or right here at Active Rain. The award winning Agent Genius website is a perfect example of how to develope a Team Blog into a beautiful e-zine. 

You can do a lot more with your Active Rain Team Blogs than you think... Don't have a team? Get one. :-)

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VideoAd by Mixpo

Deborah Stone wrote this really great and very brief real estate post entitled, "Are You Saying What I Think You Are Saying?"

She also wrote another short post entitled, "Are You Interested In What I Do, Or Are You Just Picking My Brain?"

I have been sitting over here cracking up laughing because those two Real Esate blog post titles remind me of Twitter quips. When I created @CTannStarr it was with the intention to keep in touch with my friends and send my psycho-babble tweets into their friend feeds. When I created @ClubChaos, it was specifically for the Active Rain Group Club Chaos and other interesting Tweet-peeps who I just wanted to chill and share some private thoughts with. No RSS and friend feeds with this puppy (LOL). @LittleMinionTV was created for the Team Blog Project.

I love the fact that Twitter is mobile and instant. I can DM my friends and let them know what's up, what the little minions are doing, where's I'm going and where I've been. With Little Minion TV you'll be able to see Twitter-peeps and AR blogging buddies going hyper-local on Localism. Twitter will really come in handy then because I can find out where they are and what they're doing without messing up the shots with a poorly timed cell phone ring (LOL). I am sooooo into instant gratification when it comes to people I like and multiple photo and video shoots.

BTW, I promised a few Facebook pals and Tweet-peeps I'd share the Girlie-Girlie Day activities with my cousin Amanda Marie. A couple of days ago we played all day in Manhattan and Brooklyn. We even argued over my insistence on wearing a ponytail (my fave no issue hair style). Her response? To pay to have it cut and confiscate my rubber bands (LMAO). Of course, since she's bigger than me and hits really hard I agreed. Am I teasing? Maybe... Bottom line, Marie won. She even took a picture to prove it (LOL).

Maybe I'll post some of our GGD eye candy on Little Minion TV. :-)

BTW, TLW is feeling better. Go visit her latest Members Only blog post here.

Geez. This place is not what I expected (LOL). The elevators look like something out of Tron (LMAO). I'm chilling in the Atrium on the eight floor and I have to say this is an awesome place to hang out and blog. I love wireless Internet. Audrey was kind enough to let me use her laptop so I could check in and play with you. Mikey has minion duty so I can play in Manhattan for the rest of the day. I've got my iPod going with my Hebrew lessons, just got off the phone with Melody Botting and am now wondering who else I'm gonna meet here before I cut out at 3:30 to take my Club Chaos peeps back to JFK for their return flight. This is just a tease. I'll be posting some Inman eye candy later. Jeff T is up so Audrey and Meyer have gotta go. I'm on the hunt for Brad A. Melodious will kick my a$$ if I do not take a picture with him and we all know that Mel is the boss of me. We won't even talk about Amanda's small caliber red staplers(ROTFL). Will check in tonight with the Girlie-Girlie Day post and an Inman upate with pictures. ;-) 

Update: Inman 2009 Post

I had a wonderful time at Inman 2009 and am very much looking forward to my next set of AR Road Trips.

I remember thinking as I headed towards the Marriott that TLW and Broker Bryant would not be there. I was a little sad because Billie has not been feeling well lately and I would have loved to meet them. I hope I will some time later on this year, so  please keep BB and TLW in your prayers and send them your regards. She's gonna need her strength to deal with the little minions (LOL). Besides, I believe in the power of prayer and would love to see her whole and pain free, happy with her beloved BB.

Although Inman 2009 was not the same without them, I will always treasure this experience, for I was fortunate to spend major quality time with some of the most gracious and kind people I have ever had the pleasure to meet.

My hubby took over my little minion duties so I could could hang out with the people "living in my computer." Deliriously happy that I had a play date with my Club Chaos peeps Audrey June-Forshey and Meyer Leibovitch, I also wondered who else I was going to see once we settled in for our visit. Audrey and I had been spoofing about getting together for quite some time now and anticipation can be a beautiful thing. She's always bragging about how smart Meyer is. Smart is an understatement. Dude is brilliant. After a few months of plotting and planning it was finally going to happen and I was very excited about it, like a little kid doing the Snoopy Dance. It was well worth the time and effort. I truly enjoy when on-line peeps convert into stellar brick and mortar relationships.

Nothing beats an AR Road Trip and the bonus of this Tweet-up was the fact that I was going to make the acquaintance of a few more of my favorite Tweet-peeps and Active Rain blog buddies. I couldn't wait to get in there even though I had no idea where I was supposed to be going. Nothing like a timely text message from Audrey to send me on my way (LOL). I was on the hunt for some rare eye candy and knew I would be playing "pass the camera" with my friends as soon as I set foot in the Atrium where they were waiting.

For those of you who think Twitter or blogging on Active Rain is a waste of your time, I want you to please think about it again. I got to meet a lovely group of people simply by direct messaging my cell phone to Tweet-peeps who were tweeting during the conference. We were updating in real time using the public and private Twitter time lines. We played phone tag and exchanged rapid fire consecutive e-mails. It was nice to be constantly in touch with one another. I was not the only one who was tweeting my exact location either. So did Audrey. I also posted a brief update on Active Rain while in the Atrium playing in my social media accounts using her laptop. Nothing like making use of the AR Club Chaos "Electronic Rolodex" if you need to send an e-mail or retrieve a number to reach out and touch someone. Facebook came in handy as well. We had a blast and created some lovely memories to share.

Here's a little Inman eye candy for you:

Carolyn Tann-Starr and Audrey June-Forshey

Jonathan Washburn, CTS and Jeff Corbett "The X Broker"

Audrey, Jonathan, CTS, Jeff and Meyer Leibovitch

Brad Andersohn and Ines Hegedus-Garcia  AgentGenius.com

Brad, CTS and Ines

Ines, Meyer, CTS and Audrey

Brad, Meyer, Ines and Audrey

Patricia Kennedy and Audrey

Patricia, Mitchell Hall, Brad and Audrey

Derek Overbey of Roost.com , Meyer, Audrey, Jeff J. Belonger "The FHA Expert" and Jeff Corbett

Derek, Jeff, CTS and Bob Stewart

Funky, fun, fast, futuristic elevators in New York City.

The food was marvelous and I really enjoyed the sushi. Melodious would have loved this place.

The view through the Atrium skylights. I was very sorry to have missed Poppy Dinsey and Globrix. Maybe next time...

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The Outside Bog Minion Report

Tann-Starr on Tann-Starr...

Welcome to the Susan Mangigian Wordy Version of C. This is the part of the show where I combine e-mail with four overdue Memes regarding friends, random, useless facts and personal idiosyncrasies into an Outside Blog Minion Report. Truth be known, the goal is to convert it into "The Year In Review." After all, I did promise my Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn and AR peeps that I'd do a recap of how I evolved as a blogger. Problem is, I don't feel like I've changed much...  I don't even have any New Year resolutions.

Why did I agree to do four Memes and a Recap? I don't know...

Stupidity? A moment of weakness perhaps, or blogger's insanity? Hmm... you decide. I'm too friggin' tired to figure it out and I've been up all night with the painful reminder of why I am beginning to really hate Memes. These things are viral and some people who claim to like you go out of their way to make you feel obligated to perform. Sometimes, they do not know they are doing it, while other times I'm wondering which one of us is the most anal retentive and obsessive about getting it done (LOL). Some people are really sweet and make my life fun, while others make me not want to touch them or "the writing assignment" with a ten foot pole. Seriously! In this case, the four people who tagged me are really lovely people, so how could I say no? :-)

Welcome to the Triple Meme from Hell. Yes, I know I said I was remiss with four Memes, however, quadruple just didn't have the same sinister ring to it. After all, I have 29 Q&A to do plus a friendship one. Seriously. I'm telling you, these Meme blog chain letters are evil business and I mean Eeeeeeevil with a capital E (LOL). I refuse to follow all of the rules and must confess that this one made me cranky even though I really love my friends who tagged me with their various versions of cyberHell. I am not in my happy place people and have not been so for three days. So buckle-up bay-bays and let the Meme games begin. I've got nonsense to talk about. Are you ready?  ;-)

Warning: When I'm cranky, I make "Abby Normal" look like "Mother Teresa." This happens to be true, people, so if you have a problem with that, turn back now. Seriously. I don't want you littering my comments section with sanctimonious party-pooper-party-pooh because I am prone to going where ever my cranky thoughts lead me. Like Granny Tann likes to say, "Some days you’re the bug. Some days you’re the windshield." It's my first original post for 2009 so I'm playing both sides of the splatter pattern. Bottom line, I'm just here to have some fun bantering with a few of my friends (who I will get my cyberHell revenge on) while highlighting a few of my favorite bloggers and banging out my answers to some silly and occasionally interesting questions. Looks like a good spot to share some naughty minion moments as well. Maybe I'll do a little lurking in other social media accounts while hanging out waiting for the fallout to clear...

Time for a beverage public service announcement: If you have poor bladder control, you may want to go to the bathroom now because there is no telling what might pop up regarding "The Mind Of Mama Minion." I have been known to make adults pee involuntarily, so consider yourself warned. I'm just sayin'... In addition, if you are drinking a beverage, please put it down. I'd hate to have you spew coffee/tea like they did on Richard Weisser's Post (LOL).

Time for the Naughty-Blogger-Disclaimers: Yup. Repeat after me: "I Is Gonna Be A Naughty Gal." (If you're a man, you still have to say it. It's part of your cyberHell for reading this post.) If you choose to ignore the beverage public service announcement, please be advised that sticky keyboards and stained monitors are not covered by your avatar's foodie-flood comprehensive policy or virtual errors and omissions insurance. We will NOT be held responsible for what you spill, spew or spray onto your lap, files, fax, printer, floor, clothing, relatives and into the atmosphere.

Yes, I said "relatives." Having been sprayed once or twice myself, I know what I am talking about... I am still trying to figure out if my spouse and children have horrible aim or if I've stumbled upon a minion conspiracy of grave proportions that needs to be quashed. If I must quash the minion rebellion, I will blog about it forthwith with video and film, but I digress...  Final Warning: Read my blog at your own risk. On that note, my Naughty-Blogger-Disclaimers are done. :-P

So, ya feeling kinda BRAVE today? Wanna learn something NEW about the old Tann-Starr, eh? Then get comfy sweetie pies, this may take a while... After all, rumor has it that this is "The Year in Review."

I do owe Laura Watts a friendship Meme so we're gonna start this puppy off by talking about a few of my friends: My first victim is Richard Weisser. I happen to love "Dear Richard." It is an awesome Real Estate column by a man with a very playful and creative imagination. He has recently confessed to periodically running out of blogging-gas, but twisted sisters like me keep egging him on to drive that new blog post home because (1) he is a wealth of information, (2) he is a Spanking-A photographer and (3) I love playing with people who are smarter than I am.

Advice for Richard: Fart an idea, damn it. There's nothing like a good diarrhea of words to relieve the constipation of a blocked mind. My secret weapon? Spoofing on pointless questions with no possible useful answers, then making it relative to what's going on in my life right now. How's that for transparency? (LOL) Learned something new today, did ya? ;-)

For the more sensitive souls whose mouths have just dropped open:  "The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing," Walt Disney. In case you don't understand just how critical this situation really is (Richard has a vast following, including me), I believe Susan Haughton summed it best with one astute question: "Who will start our days with wit, wisdom and pithy comments?" (LMAO) Big Hint: You do not want it to be me. Seriously. I am an acquired taste, most peculiar in flavor. Richard Weisser, however, has universal appeal, so one can easily take to him immediately. Don't let the compliment fool you. Who else would be crazy enough to post every single morning? BTW, if you take to me immediately, then you are off your meds. Seriously. But I digress... ;-)

Unlike Richard, I have minions, so that eliminates me from the running if he runs out of blogging-gas. Richard is irreplaceable and the idea of him not being there in the wee hours of the morning is simply unimaginable to me. I start my day with Paddy Pizappi and Richard Weisser. They always have something posted in the morning. I'd be lost without them. I hate losing excellent writers. I'm still suffering from Andrew J Lenza withdrawal. Thank God we still play in Facebook.  Imagination runs my mojo... I love bantering with witty people. Playtime is an integral part of my day. :-)

Here's another favorite quote: "Imagination is more important than knowledge," Albert Einstein.

In the infamous words of Melodious: "Coolio." I am soooo down with that program. The musician and artist in me really digs that quote. I gravitate towards interesting, imaginative people who are very different from me. I salute self starters and really enjoy being surrounded by a bunch of talented, playful friends. I especially adore the ones who have both the gifts of knowledge and imagination. That combination truly isn't as common as one would think. That's why Amanda Hall and Melody Botting are so dear to my heart. Everyone who knows me knows that Melodious is the boss of me. The TX twins know how to think outside the box. Lizette Fitzpatrick may be in KY, but she knows how to channel me. She's an awesome artist and we have lots of a standing jokes between us born from previous Memes. Liz is very good at thinking outside the box and knows how my mind works. I've got another Liz that I adore. Have you ever bothered calling Elizabeth Weintraub? Our hilarious conversations are truly priceless. You think her blogs really have it going on? You should pick up the phone and call my girlfriend. She's full of surprises (LMAO). If you really want to have an unusual conversation, you have got to hook up with Laura Watts and Susan Mangigian. Honey, these two chickas will make you laugh until you cry. These ladies are delightful. I never know what I'm going to get, I love a good laugh and I love these people. Cool friends like these just lift you up to another level and make it okay to laugh about stuff you might not be able to find any humor in if you were left alone struggling with your thoughts or on the verge of tears. I can say anything I want to them and they can say anything they want to me. Friendship is a rare  gift. Don't squander your social media.  ;-)

BTW, I don't just think outside the box, I live outside the box. Normal is relative in my world, which is filled with ADD, Autism and PDD-NOS. My friends know this and accommodate me and mine in the most usual and fabulous ways. From AR Road Trips to Twitter Therapy and lots of Skyping in between. Our adventures as a family have crossed the spectrum of social media and has solidified into brick and mortar soul ties. That happens to be a very rare and beautiful thing and I can not imagine my present or future life without people like Paddy Pizappi, Kathy Passarette, Susan Mangigian and the host of all my other friends in it. I absolutely love them and I'm looking forward to some very interesting AR Road Trips.  :-)

Funny how you can meet people for the first time and feel as if you've known them all of your life simply by blogging together, sharing daily e-mails and playing phone-tag. I would like to thank the Active Rain staff for making that possible. You guys (and Claire) ROCK! Thank you for creating this network and giving us the opportunity to meet some wonderful friends. BTW, Susan, don't forget to wear black. ;-)

If you missed the Little Minions AR Summer Road Trips, you can start here:

http://activerain.com/blogsview/669029/Stephens-AR-Adventure-in-PA-visiting-with-the-Mangigians-My-First-Mixpo-Video

http://activerain.com/blogsview/667417/Susan-Mangigian-ROCKS-The-Little-Minions-continue-their-AR-road-trip-adventures

http://activerain.com/blogsview/657427/Photo-montage-Audio-Blog-of-the-2008-Blueberry-Festival

http://activerain.com/blogsview/646756/From-On-line-to-Brick-and-Mortar-friendship-What-a-lovely-Pizappi-evening

http://activerain.com/blogsview/678468/The-Interesting-Thing-About-Stephen-and-Noah

Those 5 posts hold some of my fondest memories. I adore the little minions and absolutely adore my bay-bays. I'm in love with my virtual family and blogging with my peeps at Club Chaos is a lot of fun. I love the fact that I get to play with and learn from awesome people that includes the likes of Leesa L Finley, JL Boney, Midori Miller, Pam Pugmire, Tanya Venable, Cameron Wilson, Barb Szabo, Jeremy Blanton, Carole Provenzale, Barbara Carter, Mike Saunders, Cheryl Johnson, Becky Cook, Barbara Ries, Lisa Hill, TLW, Broker Bryant, Kristin Moran,  Sheila Moran, Judi Morgan,  Robert Rauf, Nicole Nicolay, Lenn Harley, Ruthmarie Hicks, Myrl Jeffcoat, Margaret Rome, Jesse Clifton, Jennifer Fivelsdal, Missy Caulk, Eleanor Thorne, Fran Gaspari, Alisha Harrison, Andrew J Lenza, Marie Meyer, Steve Shatsky, Debbie Summers, LaShawn Norden, Mirela Monte, Clint Miller, Lindsey Hasford, Gary Woltal, Amanda Hall, Melody Botting, Susan Mangigian, Chris Elizabeth Griffith, Kathy Passarette, Virginia Hepp, Liz Moras, Debra A Brooks, Mike Jones, Jeanette Neerpat, Don Rogers, Chris Fisher, Christina Williams, Jason Crouch, Paddy Pizappi, Julie Chapman, Gail MacMillian, Greg Nino, Alan May, Poppy Dinsey, Richard Weisser, Lizette Fitzpatrick, Josef Katz, Lisa Heindel, Kappy Mann, Robert Swetz, Debe Maxwell, Bill Gassett, Sondra Meyer, Lisa Glowacki, Lisa Friedman, Paul Slaybaugh, Chris Ann Cleland, Elaine Hanson, Adam Waldman, Elizabeth Weintraub, Lani A-R, Linda Davis, Cristal Drake, Elizabeth Nieves, Celeste "Sally" Cheeseman, Susan Hilton, Teri Lussier, Marianne Snygg, Ralph/Laraine Sharpe, Steve Homer, Audrey June-Forshey, Valerie Osterhoudt Sharon Paxson, April Hayden-Munsen, Kelly Willey, Jane Grant and Laura Watts. I can not possibly name every single friend I have because I enjoy caching up with a lot of people and invest time playing phone tag and meeting them across social media accounts every single day.

My social media peeps created this long post because I owe Lisa Heindel 17 Random Facts and Susan Mangigian does not like when I am being cheap with the Meme details. Lovely Lisa tagged me for a Meme on Facebook. I also owe Julie Chapman 6 Useless Facts and Myrl Jeffcoat another 6 Useless Facts as well. I am going to answer these lovely ladies right now, but I have to say Memes can really get out of hand if you are not careful (LOL). I think that's why I ignore over half of them because they are eeeeeevil (LOL). I am not going to do too many in 2009. I may start refusing them outright and just be done with them. Seriously.

BTW, here"s another fave quote: "So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads." Dr. Seuss

This is the part of the show where Carol switches to a more brief mode. Might as well answer my friggin' e-mail in public and give my lovelies their random, useless information so the torture can end (LMAO).

1. How Long have you been blogging? Less than a year, April 2008.

2. Why do you tell your age but wont give people your birth-date? Because I do not like sucky gifts and think it is a bunch of hooowee to aggravate people with the infamous lie, "it's the thought that counts..." Oh really? Puh-leeze! A sucky gift means you have crappy thoughts about the recipient. Stop asking me for my birth-date people. You do not have to say "Happy Birthday" to me. I don't mind you not saying it and do not want to be on your social calendars. Stop inviting me. Odd request? Probably yes. Will it make me happy? Absolutely! Deliriously so as a matter of fact. It would really be nice if everyone would just leave my birthday alone. It's my private holiday for me and the little minions and I do not want a virtual party or a Facebook announcement. Seriously... Stop plotting. You're going to piss me off... 

3. Why are you so comfortable being anti-social in social media? Sometimes you are downright rude. Why? Well why the hell not? Do you think because we're Realtors we are not allowed to have attitudes just like everyone else? Seriously. I do not pretend to be a perfect person and will not even try to act like something I am not. I have major issues. There are things that I do not like and I have the right not to like them. The fact of the matter is we all have an attitude and it fluctuates every moment of the day. Besides, I'm not rude all of the time and can be rather charming if you don't flip my b*tch switch (LOL). 

Lets go visit Dictionary.com for a moment to define that puppy... Attitude: noun 1. manner, disposition, feeling, position, etc., with regard to a person or thing; tendency or orientation, esp. of the mind: a negative attitude; group attitudes. 2. position or posture of the body appropriate to or expressive of an action, emotion, etc.: a threatening attitude; a relaxed attitude.

If the dictionary can describe the spectrum of attitudes people have, then why can't I have access to and make use of it just like everyone else? Why is there this unrealistic expectation that I am supposed to be off the grid with my emotions and put up with othr people's B***sh**? More than half the people who don't like my attitude usually approach me with something that they want me to do for them without regards to what I need to do for myself or family. They make unrealistic demands then tantrum when I do not cater to them. Well, I've got news for you. I have two kids and a hubby. All tantrums to be tolerated end there.  

People are quick to overlook the fact that they have attitudes all the time with me e.g.: (1) thinking it is okay to waste my time while I am trying to make a living; (2) assuming I am obligated to be their personal taxi cab; (3) not being honest about their assets and salaries; (4) jerking my chain because they think we should only be talking RE or doing market reports on AR. The list goes on and on.

Sometimes we can joke about it, sometimes we can't poke fun and laugh it off because there is no common ground or meeting of the minds. Fact of the matter is I don't like everybody and everybody does not like me. I leave people I don't like alone. I simply go away and disengage. I know how to be civil but depending on how someone pushes me there are days I DO NOT WANT TO. People count on you being civil while they misbehave hoping to stress you into making a decision they want. News flash: Been there. Done that. Lived through it. Not interested. Can't speak for you, but my list includes people in and out of the industry and a few relatives to boot. Why lie about it? I am not going to sit here and pretend that I am all things to all people because I am not. I do not have to act like Pollyanna to prove that I am good at what I do or a half way decent person. When you see my attitude, it is usually in direct response to something... like flipping my b*tch switch or messing with my bay-bays... which flips my b*tch switch (LMAO).

4. If you could choose one post monthly for someone to read from the time you started blogging, what would they be?

April 2008: Anything Andrew J Lenza. :-)

May 2008: Amanda Hall,  "Neighborhood Care Teams - A Realtor's Challenge."

June 2008: (Members Only) TLW,  "Be Unique... Or... Be Forgotten - ROAR!"

July 2008: Lizette Fitzpatrick, "Why Feed Your Client Caviar When He'd Rather Have An Ice Cube."

Aug 2008: Broker Bryant, "Help!!! I'm A Newbie And I Can't Compete!"

Sept 2008: Liz Moras,  "Is Your Real Estate Career Like A Roller Coaster Ride?"

Oct 2008: Laura Watts,  "Some Of My Memories Of The 1950s."

Nov 2008: Melody Botting,  "Pay It Forward, Again. It Will Always Come Back."

Dec 2008: Chris Elizabeth Griffith,  "Why You Should Link In, Link Up and Stink Up A Variety O' Social Networks."

Jan 2009: Lisa Heindel, "My Agent Can't Help Me. Can You?"

5. Do you like doing Memes? No, not really. Depends upon the questions. Some are crafted more thoughtfully than others.

6. Do you really like to read or are you being facetious?  I was unaware the two were mutually exclusive (LOL). I love to read and can be quite facetious. Irreverent is my favorite playful disposition. I come from a family full of wisecracking bay-bays spewing sarcasm in a Brooklyn accent. My mom is as droll as my dad is jovial. My comical kids and hubby can be quite humorous. There is nothing staid, lugubrious or dull about any of them... Hmm... I feel as if I am going to have a Dr. Seuss moment. In case you didn't notice, I have been quoting him. I did mention I could be quite facetious, didn't I? (LOL)

7. Do you read Zig Ziglar? If so, what is your favorite quote? Yup. I read Zigzig. Fave quote: "What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals."

8. What is your favorite Minion Blur blog post moment? When he tried to toast our cell phones (LOL). You can read all about it here:  "When Your Toaster Starts Ringing You Know You Are In Trouble."

9. Do you read Dr Seuss to your kids? If so, what is your favorite book or quote? Yup. I do. I got news for ya: I still read it to me too (LOL). Theodore Seuss Geisel is da-silly-bomb! Fave quote? Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind. I LOVE THIS QUOTE! It gives me such a sense of freedom. It reminds me that it is okay to just be me... I don't have to be perfect, I just have to be me.

10. What are your some of your favorite quotes that made you laugh the first time you heard them?

Shirley Temple Black: "I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph."

Robert McCloskey: “I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”

Katherine Hepburn: "I don't care what is written about me, as long as it isn't true."

Groucho Marx: "If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower."

Murphy's Law: "Tell a man there are 300 Billion stars in the Universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch it to be sure." (There has got to be an explanation for this. I can not tell you how many people I have seen poke their finger against an object that had a wet paint sign on it. Yes, I did it too - LOL).

11. List two posts that made you laugh out load.

Ralph/Laraine http://activerain.com/blogsview/828038/Home-Stager-Sued-for-Wrongful-Decor

(Members Only) TLW http://activerain.com/blogsview/734804/CRAPHave-You-Googled-It-LatelyROAR

12. What is your favorite book? The Bible.

13. What is your favorite car? One that drives, locks and has working brakes.

14. Name one benefit of participating in Memes. You can introduce your friends to other bloggers you like and get really, really silly on-line  (LOL).

15. Name three things you dislike about Memes. If not well crafted the experience sucks, the answers are lame and people actually cringe in horror to be tagged for an exercise in literary S&M. It's CyberHell. Seriously.

16. What do you like the best about social media? It's a fun way to keep up with my friends and family members.

17. What do you dislike about social media? When my peeps are lax in their security habits. When strange people on Facebook keep trying to be my friend when I keep telling them "No."

18. Best part about Twitter? Instant gratification for serial commentary. :-)

19. Worse part about Twitter? Strange people wanting to see my protected CC tweets and constantly having to say "No."

20. Favorite food? Besides Hagen Daz?

21. Favorite television shows? Fringe, The Closer, Monk, Leverage, 24, Eli Stone, Grey's Anatomy, Ugly Betty.

22. How much do you weigh? I don't know, we don't own a scale. Why? Are you going to pick me up? Seriously...

23. How tall are you? Taller than Noah, shorter than Michael, not quite average.

24. Left handed or right handed? Depends upon what I'm doing (LOL).

25. If you had a million dollars what is the first thing you would do? Pass the f*** out (LOL).

26. What annoying habit would you like to kick? Memes. With both feet. Seriously.

27. Worse insult ever received from a sibling? "If I throw a stick, will you leave?"

28. Best AR one liner? Julie Chapman: "You're just jealous because the Voices are talking to Me."

29. Favorite Anonymous quote not quite Shakespeare but makes you think he could have written it? A closed mouth gathers no foot. (LOL)

So, did I gather a foot or two today? I don't know. I do know that I have just excaped cyberHell! (LMAO) The Meme damage has been done. I tag no one for any of the previous four Memes. I reserve the right not to participate again unless the questions are really interesting and I really, really like you (LOL). If you want to make me happy, ask me about Donald Trump. I am a huge fan. :-)

My tweet peep @WendyRulnick was kind enough to make this available for a re-blog. If you haven't checked out her blog you're missing some very interesting and useful posts. If you are not following her on Twitter you may want to reconsider your position for she is a very interesting Realtor. BTW, it's her 5th year wedding anniversary today. Go over and say hello (LOL). ;-)